Flight 830 // Dan Howell

epilogue

15 years later 

"Dan! Can you babysit the kids while I go to the store?" Misty calls, unlocking the door. 

I nod and smile at her, and she sighs gratefully and walks out. 

"Daddy!" Lee screeches as she runs up to me and jumps on me. 

I laugh as I get her off me, "Yes Lee?"

"Adam has something to ask you 'bout. C'mon!" She shouts, pulling me by my middle and index finger to the living room. 

Adam stands by a picture frame, pointing at it, "Who's that with you, daddy?"

I walk over to the picture and smile. It was Ty and I on our first anniversary, on the London Eye. 

"That's my - my friend. Ty," I mumble. 

"Ooh, daddy had a giiiirlfriend!" Lee giggles. 

I shake my head, "She died though." 

Lee and Adam go silent until Lee speaks up, "Did you like her, daddy?"

I nod, "Why wouldn't I? You would've loved her."

"If Ty didn't die, would she be our mommy?" Adam asks. 

I didn't want to answer that. But his eager eyes stare into mine, "Yeah, probably." 

3 years after Ty's death, I met Misty. She healed me, and 4 years after, we started dating, and 8 years after, I married her. I couldn't imagine it any other way. 

"I'm telling mommy on you," Lee pouts. 

I pick her up and throw her over my shoulder, "No you want, because I'll put you in the dungeon!"

Lee squeals and giggles as I run to her room and sit her on her bed and tickle her. She giggles and continues to squeal. 

+

At 11 at night, Misty and I lay in bed.

"Lee told me something interesting when I tucked her in tonight," she told me. 

I turn to her, "What?"

"That if Ty was still alive she'd be Lee and Adam's mother instead of me."

I bite my lip, "But I love - loved her, Misty. I thought I'd spend the rest of my life with her. I could imagine growing old with her if she lived."

Misty sighs and turns away. I don't say anything, because I know right now she'd want to be left alone. I turn too and fall asleep.

That night, I dream of Ty in Misty's place, racing Lee and Adam down the hall, picking them up to win. I imagine Lee's giggles and Adam's shouts of glee. 

Ty would tuck them into bed and slide down the steps, tripping on the last one, and I'd catch her. She'd brush her hair out of her face and kiss me, and we'd kiss. Lee would sneak out of bed and point at us and shout 'ew!' 

We'd chase Lee upstairs and Ty would read her a bedtime story until she fell asleep, and then we'd go look at TV downstairs, kissing inbetween. 

When I wake up the next morning, I expect Ty. The dream had been so real. But I'm met my the crystal blue eyes of Misty staring at me. She kisses me and walks out of the room.

No good morning. 

Ty would give me a good morning. 

I shake my head and get out of bed, walking down the steps and fixing some coffee. Misty sits at the table, sipping on her own. 

Ty would've made me coffee with hers. 

The rest of the day, I compare everything Misty does to what Ty would do, and at the end of the night, I have the thought that Ty would've been better than Misty. 

I sigh, pulling on my shoes and walking out of the house. 

+

"I don't visit as much as I said I would," I whisper. "Sorry. I should've pinky promised."

The dandelions from so long ago sit on the edge of the tombstone, dried out and empty. 

"Guess you blew on them," I continue. "I knew you would." 

"The last time I came here was when I married Misty. So long ago. God I'm horrible, that was seven years ago. I'm horrible with promises," I mutter.

"But I guess you are too, you promised you wouldn't die, pinky promised," I say. 

I shake my head, "It's not your fault, though." 

"Anyway, I came to update on life, like I used to," I mutter. "You know that author you loved, John Green? Yeah, he died yesterday. Sorry. He had a heart attack. I was good friends with him and his brother. You were too. It sucks." 

I continue to update Ty, "Oh, and Lee and Adam, my two kids, they found a picture of you and I. The one on the Eye on our one year. I made a mistake too, and I said if you hadn't died it'd be you and I with the others. It hurt Misty's feelings. I think she's mad."

I can imagine her shoving me and calling me stupid right now, "Sorry. I kept comparing you to her all day. You were better when the day was through. I'd love to have you here." 

"Actually, Misty is better in some ways. She helped me after you died, you know. And she didn't die. That's about it though," I say. 

"I sound horrible Ty, sorry. But I love her, I swear I do," I nod and smile. "Then I should go back to her. You're shaking your head at me Ty, I know it. Stop it. Bye, love you." 

I leave fresh dandelions on her tombstone, and walk away. 

the end.