A Collection (Lauren and Lisa Cimorelli)

#1: Lonely (Part 1)

Lisa's POV

I sighed as I finished packing the last of my stuff. I can't wait to get out of this house and just leave everything behind. All of the memories I've shared with my siblings are staying here. I'm not taking them with me. They'll only cause me more pain.

"I can't believe I'm actually doing this." I told myself, whispering. I sat on the edge of my bed and just stared at the plain white walls. They used to be completely covered with thousands of pictures, posters, and fan art. I tore it apart the day we ended the band... the day that the special bond I had with my sisters simply disappeared. It's just gone now.

Mom, dad, and my siblings moved to Northern California a few months ago. They are going to stay there for like a year or something, and then they'll come back here. The only one who stayed with me was Lauren. We both decided to stay behind for our own little reasons. Our parents send us money at the end of every month to help me pay the bills. Thank God for that.

The reason that I'm leaving my family is because of what happened to the girls and I. It just hurts too much. I need an escape.

"You're really leaving?" I heard a small, timid voice ask me. I looked up and saw Lauren standing by the doorway. Her eyes were all red and puffy, like if she's been crying all day long.

"Yup. I am. Will you help me pick up that suitcase, please?"  I said, pointing at my leopard print suitcase that was just chilling in the corner.

"Why?" Lauren asked me, keeping her dark brown eyes on me.

"Because I need help-" I started to say, a little confused.

"No. Why are you leaving?" She said, raising her voice. She started to well up and her face was turning red.

"Because." I simply answered, avoiding to make eye-contact with her.

"BECAUSE WHAT?!" Lauren asked me, clearly impatient. She was yelling by now, which scared me a little bit. Lauren never yelled like that.

"Because I need to. I need to go away, leave all of this band thing behind." I replied back, keeping my cool.

"Didn't you like being in the band?" my younger sibling questioned me, a lot more quietly this time.

"You got it all wrong, Laur. Being in that band was the best time of my life. When we ended it, I just completely lost myself. I need to leave, or all of those band memories will just come back and haunt me." I explained as I looked at my old songwriting book. I picked it up and stared at the hard cover. Pictures of my sisters and I in the recording booth, laughing, and having the time of our lives were completely covering the front cover of the song journal. I miss that. I miss all of that.

"You wrote most of our hits in that book." Lauren commented, keeping her voice low. I smirked at the memory. I remember writing You're Worth It and Everything You Have in this, back in the days when we really started to get some recognition. I remember Summer With Cimorelli.

"Here. Take it. It's yours now." I told her, handing her the journal that used to be my best friend. It took me quite a while to convince myself to let it go.

"What?" Lauren said, obviously shocked. She slowly and hesitantly took it and started flipping through the pages. I looked at the clock and took a deep breath. It's 12:30PM. It's time to go. I stood up and looked around my old bedroom for the last time ever.

"Lauren, please help me with my suitcases." I quietly asked my baby sister. She glanced at me with wide eyes, and I could see the pain in them. She surprisingly didn't argue with me and actually helped me put my stuff in my car. As we got the last of my bags out of the house, she suddenly just stopped walking, causing me to *almost* bump into her.

"I can't believe you're leaving me all alone." I heard her say, her voice so strained and hoarse. Her shoulders were jumping up and down and she was shaking. She turned around to face me, and my heart literally just dropped. Tears were rolling down both of her cheeks and there were bags under her eyes.

"You're not going to be alone, Lauren. I asked Aunt Rose to come live with you for the rest of the year. Besides, everybody else is coming back here in like six months. You'll be fine." I said, trying to assure her. However, that only made things worse. Her whole face was bright red.

"Do you want to know why I didn't go with everybody else to NorCal, Lisa?" she questioned me, her angelic voice cracking and trembling. I nodded, a bit afraid of what she was going to say.

"I stayed behind because I wanted to stay with you. I didn't want you to be or to feel alone. I wanted to keep you company. Now, look at you. You're the one who's leaving ME all alone." Lauren sadly spat out, with so much pain and heartbreak in her tone. Now, I'm seriously reconsidering moving away.

"I'm sorry, Lauren, but I have to go." I said, not knowing what else to tell her. I walked past her and heard her groan.

"You're just like everybody else. They all left me, and now you're going to do the same thing. At least I had you, these past months, when nobody else was there for me. But now, you're leaving me with an aunt that I've never even met." Lauren said as she cried hysterically. Ouch. That really hurt. But, I've made up my mind. I HAVE to leave.

"Aunt Rose will be here soon." I said, walking out of the house.

"Did I do something wrong, Lisa? Please tell me why you're leaving! Please stay..." my younger sister begged me as she closely followed me from behind. I turned around and immediately regretted doing that. Lauren was sobbing so hard, it was so painful to watch.

"Goodbye, Lauren." I told her, actually struggling to get the words out of my mouth. I put my hand on the handle of my car and felt a strong grip on my right forearm.

"You think that you're the only who had been upset after we ended the band! It hurt me too! Just look at me!" she yelled, catching a few of our neighbors' attention. I glanced at her, and that's when I noticed the scars on her wrists, the bruises all over her arms, and how sick she looked. I couldn't take it anymore. I easily untangled her from me and got in my car. I slammed my door shut and looked out the window.

"I NEED YOU, LISA! PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME! I NEED YOU! I. NEED. YOU!!" Lauren begged, screaming her lungs out. She was on her knees, screaming and crying. I sighed, started the engine and drove off. As I turned around a corner, I glanced at my wing mirror. Lauren was still on her knees, on the grass. She had covered her face in her pale hands and her shoulders seemed to be a little jumpy. She was still sobbing. Some of our old neighbors were trying to comfort her, and one of them even looked up and glared at me. Then, they were out of my sight.

I drove to the nearest supermarket. I parked my car in an empty Walmart parking lot and slammed my hands on the steering wheel. I let the tears that I've held back all this time roll down my cheeks and thought about what Lauren had said to me. I thought about the last things she had told me before I drove off like a heartless freak.

I need you.

I've been so blind. I never realized how hurt and how sick she looked until today. I never really cared about her these past few months. I've been so selfish and uncaring, I just thought about myself.

What am I doing?

Author's note: Hi! Hope you all liked part one of this pretty emotional short story. I felt bad for Lauren while writing this oops. The second part should be up soon, probably Sunday. Thank you so much for reading this!!

I love you all! <3

2 comments or more for the next chapter, as usual :))