SUBMIT✔ (DSD SERIES, BOOK TWO) WATTYS2020

Memories

Enjoy.

**

"Isabelle?"

I look away from my thorough inspection of my room window at the voice and I sigh. He's here, I've been dreading every minute after I'd called him but I need this. We need this.

"Dr Monroe," I say as I shift my injure leg so I'm sitting to the side of the bed. "Come on in."

His black eyes observe me attentively as he steps into my room.

He's in a white button up dress shirt, black jeans and black gents. His brown locks are longer and like before they still annoyingly fall on his forehead as he moves around.

"Take a seat," I say gesturing to the chair beside my bed.

He chuckles before walking over to the chair and taking a seat. "That's supposed to be my line."

"Well my apologies for stealing your line Dr Monroe but I assure you the job you're needed for will remain the same," I chuckle as I make myself comfortable on the bed.

"That's good to know," is his only reply.

I nod with a timid smile as I mentally prep myself for this heart aching session ahead.

It's been two days since Johnattan left. Yes, he left California and went back to New York. He had received a call the day after our magical night saying he was needed in New York and sadly he had to go back because it's been almost a month since he's left his company to look for me here. He's been keeping track of things over here while he stayed in LA but some things just can't be fixed over the phone.

The day he left he told me he wasn't sure when he'd be back but he told me he'll try to be back soon because he didn't want to spend a day much less a week or more away from me.

When he'd said those words I was on the brink of tears– I'd just gotten him back and now he was going to leave again– and in that moment when he kissed me goodbye, the words I've been wanting to tell him since I'd found out at the hospital were clawing to be let out but I couldn't. I was scared... I was weak.

"What would you like to speak about today Ms Hinds?" Dr Monroe asks as he holds his pen and notepad in his hands ready to evaluate my state of being.

"Hase," I breathe as I look out at the window. I have to get this off my chest. For Johnattan. For my baby. "My name is Christina Isabelle Hase a-and at age 18 I was r-raped and three years later I'm a suffering from that experience."

I pause breathing deeply as I try to calm my aching heart as I look at Dr Monroe. He gestures for me to continue and I gulp calming my nerves as I continue.

"It's weaved its way into the present... I can't be with a guy without wanting to be in control because I fear if I give in they'll just ..." My lips tremble and I swallow a sob as I continue. "They'll just a-abuse me. Blue eyes, the guys I date all have blue eyes like he did and for that reason I feel a need to be in control of them. To take back the control I lost that night when h-he..." Sobs escapes my lips and I cover my mouth as I try to hold back tears.

"Christina," Dr Monroe says after allowing me to a few minutes to calm myself. "I'm going to ask you to do something for me. Can you recall a moment in your past so I'll be better equipped to treat you? It may be too painful to remember but I'm asking you please try."

I dry my tears and I look at his form. He seems a bit tense and his black eyes are sympathetic. I gulp recalling his request and nod in acceptance. "I'll try."

The words he say next leaves me frozen and everything goes numb as my heart thuds in my chest menacingly. My breathing slows down and my mind goes numb.