Out Of My Head

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Some people called it taking shelter, but she called it sweet revenge

Alexandria Winters

My porcelain hands trembled uncontrollably as I attempted to light the cigarette I held between my teeth. The cool September air prickled my skin as my eyes darted from the unlit cigarette to the huge full moon. Tears filled my blue eyes and blurred out the gorgeous scene of the midnight sky. Ryan had fallen back into his old habit of taking out all his stress on me. He was a vivid sunset that had melted into a deadly nightmare. I first met him back in eighth grade, the most gorgeous boy from the town of Bangor, Maine. Everyone from Bangor was automatically cool, especially if they were friends with Ryan. Ryan and his friends didn't only run their town, they ran the whole state. It was at a party in South Paris, Maine, my town, that our eyes found each other from across the room. He was the absolute best and we started dating. Freshman year is when things started going south. The stress from school got to his head and suddenly everything I did was wrong. One wrong move and, bang! Bruises would form all over my body and on his knuckles. But then summer would roll around and he would become the man I fell in love with. As much as I hate it, I know love hurts. So this is true love, right? Today was the second week of our senior year, our one year anniversary of moving in together, and our three year anniversary. I had gotten him a pair of shoes he had always wanted and cooked him a gourmet meal of smoked chile and mango guacamole. He was pissed, not because it was a meal we had never tried before, but because some girl accidentally walked into him in the hallway today. When he saw me waiting at the dinner table for him, his eyes flared to life with rage. He picked up his plate of steaming food and threw it straight at me. I ducked and held back my tears as he dragged me by my ankles before beating me. He later apologized and claimed it was because I looked like the girl from his school. I suddenly blinked my eyes and wiped my tears from my rouge cheeks before attempting to light my cigarette once more. It finally flared up and I took a large inhale of the smoke, feeling it swirl around in my lungs before being released back into the crisp air. I started to walk on the sidewalk by our small apartment, my bare feet tingling each time they landed on the cement. I continued to take a few drags while exploring the town I'd essentially never even left. The lights from my favorite cafe lured me down another street. My blue eyes were glued to my feet as I prayed nobody would see my bruises as I passed under the streetlights. I knew that as soon as I had entered the cafe I would be safe. Sophia's eyes would lock with mine and she'd know exactly what to do. She'd close the cafe early, make me my favorite latte then kiss me on the cheek before leading me to her home while squeezing my hand reassuringly. In the morning she would help perfect all my makeup so nobody would suspect a damn thing. I was only a few steps from the cafe, from my best friend when my body collided with another. I tilted my head up and my breath hitched when I saw hazel eyes looking down at me. For less than a second there was a spark of anger in them that caused me to instantly flinch. When he noticed my reaction, his eyes quickly softened. He ran his large hands through his curls before speaking.

"I'm sorry," he chuckled. "I didn't mean to scare you like that," his voice now quieter. I just nodded shyly, trying to get my dry throat to produce some kind of sound. His hazel eyes surveyed the bruises on my face and arms. I awkwardly looked away while biting my lip hard. "Uh, are you in trouble? Do you want me to walk you home?" The voice of genuine concern made the hair on my neck stand up.

"No, thank you. I think I'm alright," I coughed out and I could immediately tell he did not believe me.

"I think I should walk you home," He said in a bit more of a demanding tone but I shook my head quickly. He just sighed loudly. "Well, I'm Wyatt," he shrugged. "You're Alexandria, yeah? Ryan's girlfriend. You're pretty famous in this state."

"I know," I whispered, trying to hide the fear in my voice. "We go to school together, Wyatt." He nodded and his noodle like hair bounced in a way that brought a smile to my lips. I took another smoke of my cigarette before walking past him. "See you tomorrow, Wyatt."

"See you tomorrow, Xandria," he called from behind me. I entered the cafe and made eye contact with Sophia. She sighed and snatched away my cigarette then, just as I assumed, she closed up the shop, made me feel a little better, then walked me to her home.

The smell of caramel coffee instantly made my eyes flutter open. I yawned and stretched in Sophia's baby pink silk sheets before walking downstairs. The light of the kitchen blinded me while Sophia's singing made me wish I was deaf.

"Sophia" I groaned, obviously only annoyed in a playful way. I approached the table in the middle of the kitchen as she put plates of pancakes on the table. I grabbed our coffees and we sat across from each other, sipping our drinks. "So," I started. "Guess who I quite literally ran into yesterday as I was coming to see you."

"Who?" Sophia asked with one eyebrow raised in curiosity.

"Wyatt."

"Oleff?" She asked and I nodded. "Wow, you have literally never talked to him in your life. Did he see your bruises?" She held her breath until I answered.

"Yeah," I muttered. I knew she could help me come up with a story. Together we ate our pancakes and discussed our plans. Then, we ran upstairs and got ready for school. We decided I had to look at good as I could to make it seem like everything is alright. I pulled on a black and white striped crop top, a brownish tan skirt, black thigh highs and my riding boots. I look in Sophia's mirror before asking her to snap a picture of my outfit. She does so and I post it on my Instagram.

☾∞☽

Instagram

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Instagram

(Xandria): @ wyattoleff started following you!
(Xandria): @ wyattoleff commented, "wow, this is absolutely gorgeous."
☾∞☽

I threw my phone at Sophia and she caught it swiftly.

"Ooooooo," she said making a kissy face.

"Ew Sophia. Plus, I love Ryan," I muttered and she rolled her eyes.

"He's a douche," she stated blandly. I just shrugged.

"Maybe, but a lovable douche," I retorted, and with that we fell into a comfortable silence. We completed our makeup and hair before walking out into Sophia's red camaro. She always preferred it when I drive, so I got into the drivers seat as she turned on the radio. Together we sang loudly as we drove our way towards the school. I didn't know what was going to happen that day, but I knew I wasn't prepared.

☾∞☽

Authors note: I do not intend to romanticize abuse, alcohol, or drug use. If this has offended you, I am sorry but it is just for the plot of this story. Also, Wyatt, Alexandria, Sophia, Ryan and characters are all around age 17.

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