Sweet Seduction

Kyle & William

Kyle

Before my best friend William came out to me then told me that he loved me, I was quite willing to live life as a straight guy. Of course I wasn't, but I was so scared of my own feelings and what my parents would say, that I was prepared to live the lie. That was until William kissed me, and it reawakened all these feelings that I had damped down. That one simple act of realization, made me realize I would much rather be true to myself and experience love than to hide from it forever. 

Then he went away for a year, without knowing how I felt, leaving me to sort out my feelings and learn to accept who I really was. To say my parents were unhappy with my coming out would be an understatement. They sent me to a psychiatrist, a psychologist, a priest even. They also demanded that I not have anything to do with William. That was the longest year in my life. Then William was back, and we made up for lost time, much to the horror of my parents. Thankfully, William and his family provided much of the support I needed. 

Everyone knew that my parents never forgave me for being gay. My closest friends and William's family became my own family. My parent's and I kept up polite appearances but I never quite stopped seeking their approval wanting the easy relationship we had shared. They made it clear though, that as long as I was living this lifestyle, as if it were a choice, they could not support me. My parents stopped shy of disowning me, but it always felt like it. Imagine how awkward it would be to visit your parents as a guest in their house while actually living only a few feet away next door. Unfortunately, trying became too hard, and not being a part of each other's lives became the easiest way for me to have a better life.

Eventually in the middle of our junior year at York, William and I got an apartment together ten minutes away from campus. It just didn't seem right to live as a couple at William's house. Besides, his dad had stricter rules than we thought. Besides, he would support us if we kept our grades up. Will and I got even closer living together, and it always amazed me that I could find something new to love about William every day. Those years were anything but easy though, but we managed. Between juggling school and his games and jobs and our friends, it felt like we were barely hanging on at times. We made it work and came out stronger as a couple for it.

William's passion was baseball he lived and breathed it. His dream was to play professionally. He was scouted heavily and at the end of our senior year was farmed to the minors double A team, as a second baseman for the Richmond Braves. There was frequent travel and long times spent away from each other, but I made the five hour trip to Virginia for games as often as I could. 

Things were going great for me as well, I was doing an internship through the American Institute of Graphic Arts and I was being looked at for a Junior Designer position within my firm. We were able to move to a bigger place more convenient to work for me and further away from the college scene. We were happy and deliriously in love. But always when things are lined up just right there comes a curveball to upset the flow.

The call about William came late one afternoon. He was accidentally hit in the head during practice and had suffered a brain hemorrhage. By the time his dad, brother and I got there he was already in the OR. We were told that he had also suffered a stroke, and the immediate surgery was needed to ease the pressure on his brain. We waited, each of us leaning on each other as needed. I was shattered, my world crumbling inside. I wished I could have held William's hand and let him know we were all here rooting for him. I wanted to just hold him.

We waited for hours and finally the doctor came out. William was going to be okay. We just all hugged each other ad shed the tears we were too afraid to before. His recuperation would be long, but he was going to be okay. A month later we flew Will home. He was to undergo physical and occupational therapy for any lingering weakness. We were also warned on the possibility of seizures. The months that followed were an exercise in fortitude.