A Sense of Belonging

Chapter 1

*have fun reading :D critique and suggestions are welcome*

The evening had been trying to say the least. Blinky had been accidentally punched in the face trying to break up a disagreement, giving him two black eyes and a good deal of bruising, but that was just the frosty tip of the frustration iceberg the last few hours had been. If Blinky were to be honest with himself, he was starting to feel hopelessly incompetent.

These trolls were scared, and getting into countless disagreements just to blow off their nervous steam. There had been disagreements about shelter locations, tents vs tunnels, food and water supply stocking, and camp duties. Sure, the trolls were listening to Blinky's orders, but it seemed that given a moment alone, they fell apart.

Blinky felt as though he was hanging on tenterhooks; there was always one troll or another criticizing him; whenever he solved a problem it seemed that at least one troll was never satisfied. He tried not to care about what others said behind his back, was it was difficult to ignore the whispers. Was this how Vendel felt? What he had to deal with every day?

A loud bang and a scream sounded from across the camp. Blinky ran to find the source, his heart pounding with panic, only to find Krava, a bullish troll, sitting in the middle of the weapons stock, glaring furiously at a large female troll across from him. "She pushed me! All I was doin' was lookin' at the vlork stones!' The female troll, who Blinky recognized as Cvet, angrily retorted, "He was stealing! I saw him stealing! He has more in his bag right there." Indeed he did.

Blinky rubbed his forehead with one hand, exhaling slowly. "Those are very rare Krava, please try to be more careful. I guess we are simply lucky that nobody was hurt." He guessed that just one had gone off, since nothing was incinerated. Krava started to smirk at Cvet, thinking he had won, but went into a sulk when Blinky added, "I will not tolerate theft, especially of supplies that we all need very badly. I'm dissapointed, but I am assigning a guard shift to the weapons stockpile. Do not let me catch you again. Now put these back, and afterwards you will be confined to your shelter for the rest of the night. Cvet, please stay here until I can set up a shift cycle." She grinned in triumph, settling into a spot where she could watch Krava's every move.

Even with the situation sorted, Blinky couldn't help but feel frustrated. Was he not harsh enough? Krava really wasn't a bad troll, he just had a hard time understanding the difference between 'mine' and 'not mine'. Still, at least he had listened. Blinky had Aargh and countless other strong trolls to help him if someone got violent, but he fervently hoped it wouldn't come to that. If they started fighting themselves, they could never hope to fight Gunmar together.

Wandering through the camp, Blinky saw Jim and Draal training some trolls in basic combat skills. They didn't have enough weapons for everyone in the camp to defend themselves when the time came, but the survivors of the invasion of trollmarket would have to make do. When Jim saw his mentor watching, he had Draal take over the class while he sat on the grass beside Blinky. Jim was breathing hard and he was sweating, but he really enjoyed teaching the trolls. The young trollhunter had been smiling, but he frowned, concerned, when he saw Blinky's face.

Blinky had forgotten that the right side of his face looked like a black-and-purple punching bag, and he tried to turn so that it didn't look quite so bad. It was too late though, Jim had already seen, and he asked, "Aargh told me you got hit on accident, but he said it wasn't that bad. Otherwise I would have cut class, I could have gotten you ice or something and it might have healed a little better by now."

Shaking his head with a smile, Blinky answered, "I don't want you to miss important parts of your life in the human world. School is important for you Master Jim, and I didn't want you worrying all day over nothing. I insist that I'm fine, it doesn't even hurt much anymore."

That last bit was a lie, but Jim didn't have to know that. For Blinky, having someone worry over him was fairly new, and it made him embarrassed and self-conscious. His face ached, throbbing and feeling painfully stiff. He had suffered worse, and bruises always got worse before they got better anyway.

A short while later, when the class was coming to a finish, Jim saw Claire and excused himself to go talk to her. Blinky could see the strong bond between the two, and his heart ached with worry; he was afraid that Claire hadn't come out of overextending herself with the shadowstaff completely unscathed, and Blinky was concerned that this would distract Jim from his task of killing Gunmar. There was nothing he could do but wait, see, and hope that the two young lovers would be alright in this world of hardships.

Deciding that an undisturbed, peaceful walk before dinner was just what he needed, Blinky scribbled a note and stuck it to his tent. It was just easier this way; if Blinky told his friends he was going they would want to come as well, or Jim would likely insist on an armed guard to accompany him. It isn't like it's me that's needed, just as long as someone's in charge, Blinky thought, they just needed someone to give orders. They would be fine without him for a few minutes; maybe they won't even notice I'm gone.