Nine months

October

An inappropriate party

At least I knew what I had now- Pomferey was able to prescribe me a fairly useless anti-nausea potion, and soon I could go down to the Great Hall with everybody else and eat like a normal human being, which I had missed. But it wasn't something I could fix with a simple potion. I hadn't planned on growing pregnant at fifteen during my penultimate year at Hogwarts, but it was done now. I was pregnant.

I didn't think that anything could distract me from my Newts, but this new baby living inside me could. Instead of madly revising Charms and Arithmancy, I sat for hours in the library, researching about wizarding births, and what would be different. I had to know everything. I was going to be a mother!

The only problem was I didn't have the bottle to tell anyone else.

Well, McGonagall had told all the staff, and they had reacted in different ways. Professor Burbage, for example, was as chatty as always, a Flitwick was perfectly friendly. Some didn't seem bothered- Binns didn't look at me any differently, however, he didn't usually bother himself with learning about the students he taught. McGonagall was slightly different, she kept me behind when she thought I looked unwell, and often threw me thoughtful glances (I didn't think she approved of teenage mothers), but otherwise said nothing. 

And finally, there was Snape. Apparently, his hatred of children stemmed to almost a phobia of babies- he stayed as far away from me as possible and didn't pick on or even look at me in class. I wasn't sure which reaction I disliked the most.

But telling my actual friends? Obviously, they'd want to know, but how would they react? Ron would be freaked out- periods made him jump, let alone babies. And I knew he had a crush on me, and he would be heartbroken to think I'd had sex with someone else, even if I hadn't wanted to. Lavender and Pavarti would gossip between themselves- probably saying I looked terrible, although I had been warned by Pomferey that the worst was yet to come. Luna would probably insist on sticking a gurdyroot or similar up there to talk to the baby. Ginny would be mad for her brother too. And Harry? I didn't know about him. I'd never brought up the topic of children with him. Maybe it was time.

I couldn't just ask him outright- although that's what I would have preferred to do. Instead, I waited until the weekend, until Ron was busy in detention and for once Harry wasn't involved. I let small talk grow as we brewed our coffees (mine was secretly decaffeinated- Harry had mentioned that I looked tired, though I couldn't bear to damage the baby so soon into my pregnancy) and sat down in the most run-down area of the common room- in front of the single, sagging couch in the corner, with the built-in cushions removed and thrown elsewhere, so that we were balancing on a shared bean bag, nursing our cups and painful backs.

"Will you ever have children, Harry?" I asked randomly, looking at the rest of the room to avoid eye contact with him. 

"Would you?" he asked, sipping his drink, following my eye to where Fred and George were messing around with Lee. "You grew up being an only child, would you want that for your kid?"

"Merlin, no" I chuckled. "It's nice and quiet, a nice change from this madhouse. But it gets lonely sometimes. I guess you're more sociable when you grow up with other people similar to your own age."

"Not always. I had Duddley, and he's not exactly pleasant company." I cringed, remembering stories of the bully from his childhood, and his evil aunt and uncle. I'd tried to speak to him outside of school, even check up on him, but he wasn't allowed to contact us "freakish magic folk". The best I could do was send him letters and food parcels to make sure he was eating enough, which ate up all my wages from the summer, not that I cared.

"I don't think he counts" I reminded him quietly. I had never met loud-mouthed cousin Dursely, but from descriptions of him from Harry (where I knew he was holding back the most painful facts), I didn't think the two of us would have much in common. I thought of his real family- James and Lily Potter. "Do you think you would have been an only child if the circumstances were... different? I mean, imagine Harry the big brother! It suits you."