Running

Chapter Five

I stood there, completely still, barely hanging on to the railing behind me. The rope still lying on top of my shoulders and around my neck. I squinted towards the bright lights that had caught my attention. Was that really what it looked like? A circus tent? I didn't even know there was a circus in town. I wondered if they were performing tonight. I obviously didn't bring any money with me. Another thought entered my head. I could... No. There was no way. I paused. Well, maybe I should at least try.

I climbed back over the railing, slowly, cautiously. It was a lot harder to go backwards than it was to get over in the first place. One wrong placement of my foot and I would be through with this. My life as I knew it would be over. But, I didn't want to go through with it now. At least, not yet. It was worth taking a chance, I decided. I slipped my legs over the railing. I jumped back down to the wooden boards beneath me. I pulled the rope over my head and laid it on the ground. I decided to just leave it there. If I needed it, I could come back for it. Otherwise, no one would know who left it. I stepped off the bridge, headed in the opposite direction I came from.

The moment my bare feet touched the cold, dew ridden grass, I felt a deep sigh escape me. Maybe there was another option. Maybe I could live my life, but as a different person, behind a mask of sorts. I could forget about me. But did people really run away and join the circus? It sounded so cliché. Surely they had to fill out an application and go through some sort of hiring process or audition or something. Not that I couldn't do that. But who would I put as a reference? I didn't know anybody. In fact, the whole application would be hard to fill out with my current situation. Oh, and there was that underage thing too. I stopped walking. Maybe this wasn't worth it.

I wondered what they were doing at this time of night. The lights were on, but that didn't necessarily mean anything. It was probably a safety precaution. Circuses probably get animals and props stolen all the time if they aren't careful. I guessed most of them were probably sleeping, with the exception of a few of them getting drunk. I smiled. I could picture a bunch of clowns with painted faces sitting around a table, maybe with a few oddities, like a bearded woman and a strongman, all drinking and laughing. Their faces would be getting more and more red as the night goes on. Maybe it wasn't an appropriate place for me to be.

Well, maybe it wasn't appropriate, but I could be whoever I wanted. I could be free.

I stepped forward once again.