A New Way of Life (LGBT)

chapter 17

*MATTHIAS*

I run my hands through my hair as I pace outside the hospital room.  I know it’s not fair to leave Serena alone with Zainey at the moment, but I just needed to get out of the room for a couple of minutes before I lose it and take all my frustrations out on him.  Although I’m kind of upset with him because he knows not to overdo it, we’ve stressed it with him enough,  he’s five for goodness sake and shouldn’t have to worry about stuff like that.  So it definitely wouldn’t be fair to take it out on him.

Zainey has a medical condition where he was born with a whole in his heart.  Yes it’s possible.  We were told he probably wouldn’t be able to do a lot of stuff most kids do, but so far we haven’t had too many problems with him and he’s managed to handle a lot more than we ever imagined.  He just doesn’t like to take it easy; he hates being seen as weak, especially when his younger twin is always so full of energy and into everything.

So what happened today was Zainey overdid it in recess and ended up passing out so they had to send him to the hospital.  Serena met them there and left a message for me to pick up Elijah who automatically knew something was wrong with his twin.  I went ahead and left Elijah at my mom’s with her well wishes and prayers for Zainey.  My mom is probably the best well-meaning person I know.

I turn around to start pacing the other way again and freeze when someone turns the corner.  I recognize him immediately even when he’s not looking this way.  I would have thought that the time away from him would have lessened my feelings for him, but no such luck.  What is he doing here anyway?

“Nico?”  He startles and looks at me.  God I miss seeing his adorable face of his.

“Mattie! How is he?  Where’s Serena?”  Mattie?  Since when does he call me Mattie, and what happened to Thias?  Wait, why’s he asking about Serena?

“Huh?  What are you doing here?  How do you know what’s going on?”

“Serena called me?”  Now I’m really confused.  Since when does Serena talk to Nico and how did she get his number?  I think I have a lot of questions for them when all this is over.  The three of us will probably need to sit down and have a chat.

“So... how is Zainey?  Is he okay?”

“Oh, uh, yeah he’s holding in there now.  He’ll probably be in the hospital for the rest of the week though.  He’s sleeping at the moment, Serena’s in there with him.  You can go on in.”

“Okay, how you holding up?”  Not too well, but I’m not going to let him know that.  He worries too much as it is.

“Okay, it’s difficult, but I’m hanging in there.”

“That’s good.  Now I’m going to go in there, you’ll come in when you are ready?”  I love how he automatically knows that I’m out here because I need time to myself.  I’m big on my alone time if you haven’t noticed, mainly when everything is going crazy around me.

“Uh yeah, sure.”  He turns and walks into the room.

“Nico!  You made it!”  I hear Serena exclaim and when I turn to look I see her giving him a huge hug and crying into his shoulder.

“Of course sweetie, I told you I would.”  What the hell is going on here?

*SERENA*

I hear Mattie pacing outside.  His pacing is making me nervous, but I understand the need to do it.  All of a sudden it stops.

“Nico?”  Oh, so Nico’s here!  Yay!  Now hopefully we can all relax some.  I have a feeling his presence might help smooth over our emotions even if there is some tension from the past month there.  That’s why I called him.  That and I needed a friend seeing as how Jamie still wants almost nothing to do with me.

I zoned out so much that I didn’t even realize they finished talking.  I look up from the bed and Zainey to see Nico entering the room.

“Nico!  You made it!”

“Of course sweetie, I told you I would.”  There he goes with the sweetie again.  Mattie is so lucky to have Nico in his life, even if they are at odds at the moment.  I’m sure it will all work out in the end, though I’m sad that it will probably leave me alone.  No, not alone, I’ll always have my kids.  I look at Zainey again.  Or will I?  With that thought I’m in Nico’s arms in a flash and sobbing.

“Oh sweetie, it’s all going to be okay.  He’s fine now.”  Yeah, but for how long?  How many more hospital visits are we going to have to have?  Will he even make it to his teens?

“Hey, hey.  Come on now Serena, don’t worry too much about it.  The important thing is he’s okay now.”  How did he know what I was thinking?  I wonder if it’s like this with Mattie too.

“I-I know.  It’s just that…”

“Shh.  It’ll all be okay, you’ll see.  Just we need to be strong and try to stay calm for him and Elijah.  They need you and Thias right now.”  He’s right, so I just nod and back away from him drying my tears.

“I bet you’ve been here since he got admitted haven’t you?”  I nod again and sniffle looking at the bed.  He looks so pale and helpless my baby.  I can’t believe he’s here.  Though in retrospect given his condition I guess I shouldn’t be too surprised.

“Why don’t you follow Thias’ example and take a break?”  I look at him incredulously.

“What?”

“Well, I think you could probably use a break.  Go freshen up, grab something to snack on.  Besides you don’t need to stress the baby any more than you already are.”  I put my hand on my stomach and thank about it.  Now that he mentions it I notice my stomach is bothering me and I am a bit hungry.  Actually that sounds like a pretty good idea.  I look over at Zainey again, but I don’t want to leave him.  What if he wakes up and needs me?

“Go on Serena, he’ll be fine.  Just for at least five minutes please?  I don’t want to have to worry about you too.”  My head snaps to him.  He worries about me?  How utterly sweet of him.

“I don’t want to leave him alone though.”

“He won’t be alone sweetie.  I’ll stay here with him and I’m sure once Matthias cools off he’ll be back in here too.”  I think about it for a few minutes.  He does make a good point, and I really do need to try and get some food in me.  If not for me, I need to for the baby.  That does it; I don’t need to have to worry about another one of my kids.  Even if it’s not born yet.

“Okay, but you’ll call me if anything changes?”

“Yes, of course.”

I nod and head out in search of the cafeteria.