Dear my first love,
Why did you have to leave me so soon? You said you were unhappy, but you never showed it. Just hours before you left we were laughing and having a good time. What ever happened to that? Did you forget about all the good time we shared, or did you just not care?
I remember every little detail of our memories. From the first time you texted me. It was an abundance of memes. I thought it was funny, that you didn't even say hi first. We started talking more and more after that, I started catching feelings. You had a girlfriend at the time and I knew you loved her. I should have took that as a sign that it was never meant to be. I did not stop then, but boy do I wish I did.
After weeks of talking, your girlfriend dumped you for some new guy and I helped you over it. I listened to you talk about her no matter how bad it hurt. I soon confessed my feelings and it turns out you felt the same way. We talked on the phone for hours on end until we decided to meet in person. We met at the park and we stayed there for hours.
I went home that night with a smile on my face. You texted me saying how great of a time you had. Said you wanted to kiss me, but wasn't sure about it. A few days passed and we decided to hang again.
The same thing happened, but when I went to leave, you grabbed me by the waist and leaned right in. Your lips met mine and it felt like the movies. My heart jumped in my heart as I started to kiss back. You pulled away, smiled at me, and leaned in again. This happened on July 26th, can you believe that?
After that day, we spent so much time together. You would come over in the mornings when no one was awake and we would sit on my porch and chat for awhile. Soon school started and we walked there and back together. You made the stress from school easier to manage. With you by my side I felt like I could conquer the world.
Our first real date we went to the movies. We watched The Mountains Betweem Us and you constantly commented on how cheesy the plot was. You snuck kisses and held my hand the entire time. You even told me you had such a great time. What happened to that?
October came and we spent Halloween together. We didn't dress up, but it felt wonderful just being by your side. We got some candy, and watched my nephew mutter trick or treat. You laughed that amazing laugh of yours. The laugh I fell in love with.
You asked me to officially be your girlfriend on November 11th (even if I did forget the date at first). That day made my entire month. You grabbed me by the hand when we were walking home and said, "Kierra, will you be my girlfriend?" An uncontrollable joy came over me. I smiled and gave you a kiss.
Thanksgiving came and you met my mom's family. They liked you a lot and we even took a picture with my whole family. Over time, we started spending almost every day together. I bought you anything you wanted since I knew you had no money. I never expected much in return except for your love and attention and you gave me that.
One day you went with me to fix my phone. On the way back you took me to get pizza. We laughed and had such a good time, just like everything other time.
You were always considerate and such a gentleman. When Christmas came I gave you sweatpants, a letter I had written myself, and a necklace to resemble mine. You wore that necklace everyday after that.
New Year's Eve came and it was time for you to meet my dad's family. You were nervous and to tell you the truth, so was I. I tried not to show it. They met you without a problem and they actually liked you. We danced a little bit even though you were a little awkward. We had our kiss at midnight and I still felt the flutter like it was our first. We walked home together and said our goodbyes. I felt like I had started off the new year right.
In the month of January, you told me that necklace broke. You said you wanted to cry because it meant so much to you. I said it was fine and that I could just get us new ones, but you decided to fix it. What happened to that person that cared so much?
February came and it was Valentine's Day. I wrote you another letter and got you a stuffed sloth because you think they look like pedophiles and you thought they were funny. You loved it so much and gave me a big kiss. You gave me a stuffed puppy that I still cuddle with. We had an argument that day, and sure it was my fault. I apologized, you forgave me, and we left it at that.
We started to bicker about stupid things a bit more. I thought is was nothing because every couple argues. Even couples who are bound by marriage tend to still argue. Apparently however, you were seeing it as the end of an era.
Then just 6 days later you were telling me how unhappy you have been. I didn't notice. I was too in love to tell. I thought we were fine, sure we were arguing somewhat, but every relationship has its ups and downs. You just weren't ready to face those ups and downs with me. You showed no sympathy as I cried out for you. You acted like I was a stranger. You were cold to me and still are. How can you treat me as though I never mattered? You broke up with me the same day my great uncle died. You knew he died and that I was depressed. You didn't try to help me at all, you just worsened it. Now I've been eating less and crying more. You were my anchor, but now I am left drifting on the sea.
