Obsession (Jeff the killer x reader)

Chapter nine

You wish you could remember how it began... you just couldn't... it just seemed like.. one day he was in your life.. and you never questioned it...

But some where.. deep down... you knew the whole story.. in gritty detail...

...

You were never a great child. You always had emotional issues, mood swings.. and the run of the mill "problems" that the "problemed" children had growing up. In all actuality to say you were the "problemed," child... this description would be very accurate...

Your parents never really dealt with the issues you had, believing that you would eventually grow out of them. Besides they had other kids to deal with...

You never blamed them though... you knew it wasn't their fault you felt the way you felt... and you knew deep down.. that they loved you.. and truly didn't know what was going to happen next... and they didn't know that their incompetence would lead to this chain of events that unfolded...

And you were even sure that somewhere deep down.. they hated themselves for what they felt responsible for. you liked that though... it was some sort of closure.. because they felt that way.. you never felt that you needed to seek revenge for the normal sane human being you could have become... you felt that the matter was just left as it is... and you were alright with that.

In your younger years.. while you still had so much rage.. confusion.. depression and animosity jeff came in.. and swooped you away to deal with your problems in a self destructing type of way. Which in a way, you were thankful for.  You weren't like jeff... you couldn't just kill your parents or hurt them.. without hating yourself for the rest of your life... and you couldnt just hurt others with out clearing up later.. and live with the consequences.. but you could hurt yourself and feel nothing as a result... which i guess just seemed more livable..

You were sure that your parents.. must had been grateful too..  not for the self destruction you brought on yourself but for the fact that they no longer had a problemed child to deal with.. but of course.. that was not the case.. because problemed or not.. you were still their child.. and you know.. now having a child yourself.. you understood that

You were always a unruly child... going through elementary school with many visits to the principals office... and many suspensions.. you had anger issues.. and you never played nice... leading to isolation from the other kids... leading to more anger and misplaced rage...

In middle school... you seemed to simmer down a bit.. going to a new school in a new town away from all the "problems" of the other one. you cant run from your problems... because they always.. find you.. no matter where you hide...

Middle school was alright... you found new friends who acted like you... just angry at the world for no good reason... and you clung to them because finally for the first time.. someone sorta understood you..  and you would do anything to keep them.

They taught you the ways of dealing with your anger... which lead into you doing drugs... and drinking... the something that numbed all your problems and started you off on the path of self destruction.

But it was also something that eventually lead you to meet jeff... and something that made you not scared of him... it was something that attracted you to him...

He was all your problems personified into one person... and it was incredible... so incredible. Now you had finally found the one person who was just like you.. but more extreme... braver then you.. stonger then you... the unstable high school student just couldn't resist

Of course now you werent like him. In fact now you can say he beat the rage and life out if you, or at least the life you were living before. Now you were more.. calm.. quiet... almost sedated... but hey, trauma does funny things to people.