Short story's

Theres types

I'll cry out of no where. That's a unexplainable depression. Wanting skinship? Lonely depression. Tragic moments. Sad depression. And so on and so on. Etc. Etc. what's it called when you want to be loved but you have a deficiency and can't seem to understand what or how to love. Is that being desperate? I'd be laughed at if I said this out loud. How would I even find words to makes others understand. I. Crave (?). Love. But how can I want something so much even though I don't know what it is or have never felt it. I thought I did. But now I'm not so sure. Who would ever want such a lame ugly thing.