I Will Not Tell Voldemort to "Get A Life."

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A/N: I hope you enjoy! Fred doesn't appear in this because he is serving detention with Filch (like always).

George is set on working on a beautifully scripted letter for You-Know-Who to see. The quill creates quick words that turn into paragraphs fills up the entire paper.

Harry notices George writing something and asks, "George, what are you writing there?"

George continues writing, not bothering to look up. "A beautifully scripted essay telling your fated enemy to get a life."

Harry raises an eyebrow. "And which owl will you sacrifice to get the job done?"

"One of the school owls, of course. I'm not that stupid to know that You-Know-Who has anger problems." George replies.

"Well, I'll be at your funeral." Harry says. He pats George on the shoulder and disappears to go to sleep.

George finishes up and quickly signs, 'A concerned Death Eater.' He quickly puts it into an envelope and heads to bed, planning to send it in the morning.

At the place where Voldemort resides.

"My lord, a letter has arrived bearing your name." Wormtail says, nervously, his hands clutching the envelope like a lifeline.

"Bring it to me." Voldemort orders. Wormtail scurries over to him and shakily puts the letter in Voldemort's outstretched hand.

"Leave." Voldemort says. He did not need to say it twice. Wormtail was out of the room before Voldemort could take in another breath.

His hands work the letter out of the envelope and his eyes quickly scan it.

Dear You-Know-Who,

I come bearing important words that you must take to your heart. Your life is being wasted by the second, obsessing over Harry Potter. I get it. He is dashing but your obsession is akin to a 12 year old girl's crush over him. Your obsession is taking over your life. So I urge you to get over it. He is not going to love you at all, since you killed his parents (another sign that you have a lifelong obsession).

I suggest that you stop obsessing over him and achieve good things. Your obsession is stupid and your life is not precious. So I suggest that you die and get a different life somewhere else.

So, I bid you adieu with these words, 'Get A Life'. In your case, a different one.

Love,

A Very Concerned Death Eater

A short moment after that, a scream echoed in the halls. A Death Eater hurried to check it out and unfortunately, he didn't come back alive.

Voldemort was in an extremely bad mood for the rest of the day.

It sucks to be a Death Eater, sometimes.

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