After The War

Hiding Behind Trees

Now
Kyla

It wasn't hard to catch up to Lily and Tyler. They were extremely slow walkers.
Any other time it would have annoyed me but today it helped.

I was thankful that they hadn't asked about what had happened. I didn't like that I had weaknesses like this and I liked talking about it even less. Especially with people I didn't know extremely well.

They were walking up front with Jeremy now, talking about fighting techniques and the importance of strategies, laughing together.
I walked behind them, refusing to engage in the conversation.

Still, I rolled my eyes at the back of Jeremy's head, who was currently lecturing the two kids that a good strategy was the key to the positive outcome of a fight.
Jeremy loved his strategies.
Everything had to be planned and in order for him.
He might have turned into a pretty good fighter over the years but he still wasn't very spontaneous.

I watched them talk and laugh and was painfully reminded that I used to talk and laugh like that, too.

I caught Lily looking at me with an empathetic and apologetic look on her face, again. This had to be the fifth time she had turned around to look at me. It was annoying.

I didn't want her pity. Nor did I need it.

At least it seemed like she didn't hate me as much anymore. Probably, because she had seen that I had feelings, too - somewhere deep down.
I didn't care but whatever.

"What are you looking at?", I snarled at her and she whipped her head back forwards, not saying a word. From behind I could see Jeremy's shoulder tense.

I knew that he disapproved of my bad mood but I couldn't say I cared much.
Sometimes Jeremy had very unrealistic expectations of me.
I could never just be happy and nice around everyone like he was. It just didn't work.

"Are we there yet?", I asked now, interrupting the conversation the three of them had had.
We'd been walking for a while now and it felt like we should have already arrived at the kids' camp.

My backpack was heavy and I was sweating. I didn't want to walk any longer.

Summer was ending and while the days were getting gradually colder and somewhat shorter, right now it felt as if the sun was burning down on my head with the intention of melting me.
I would have killed for a drop of water right about now.

Of course, I wouldn't have admitted any of that to Jeremy.
He would only take it as a chance to gloat and tell me that he'd been right about what to pack.

"Almost", Lily said and came to a stop rather abruptly. "It's right in front of us now, actually. There, through the trees."

I was about to tell her that everything around here was through trees – we lived in a forest –but I held myself back. Right now I had better things to do than mock little children.
So instead I let my backpack fall to the ground and marched to the front of our group, once again taking on the position of the leader.

"Alright", I said. "This is what we're going to do: Tyler or Lily, either one of you will watch my backpack and drag it along, since I'll be doing the fighting and you two need to be good for something at least."
Tyler groaned and Lily rolled her eyes.

Jeremy just looked at me with a judgmental look and it took everything in me to not just punch him in the face right there and now.
I couldn't believe he would take the side of the two brats.

"I've dealt with people like this before, so the first thing we'll do is assess the situation. No rash movements, no loud sounds, we're just going to observe. Then we can talk about strategy or whatever", I said with a side glance towards Jeremy.