As usual,, I'm left here..By myself..
All alone..
Nakatingin ako sa langit,
gustong ilabas ang aking galit sapagkat,
may onti pang bait
kaya't pinilit kahit masakit..
Ano ba ang ginawa ko diyos?? At ganito ang aking sinapit na kapalaran..
***
Nagpunta na ako sa loob ng apartment,,Tinigil ko na yung pagdadrama ko,, inimpake ko na ang mga gamit ko at umalis..Nagcommute nalang ako papunta ng airport,,Kaso naisipan ko nalang na pumunta sa lumang bahay ng parents ko,, Di pa kasi binenta, atsaka medyo malapit din sa airport kaya naisipan ko na pumunta..
Pagkarating ko doon, May ilaw na galing sa loob ng bahay,, Naisip ko na baka naglilinis yung caretaker ng bahay ng parents ko, yung hinire ni ate para pangalagaan dito yung bahay ng parents ko..Hindi niya pinayagan na pakielaman ng caretakers ng bahay na pakielaman yung gamit dun..Basta lilinisin lang nila at yun lang.
Pumasok ako dirediretso ng gate at pinto,It was already open but, Nakita ko na walang tao pero nakabukas yung ilaw..
Sayang kuryente ah, Walang tao nakabukas yung ilaw? Petmalu kamo sila..
Naglibot libot ako dun,,Hindi nagbago yung kinalagyan nung gamit since i was a little kid..Dati kasi bumibisita kami dito ni ate..
Pumunta ako ng 2nd floor ng bahay,, Andun yung kwarto nila Mom at Dad..Pumasok ako sa room,,Nakakatakot dito, Ang dilim kase kaya binuksan ko yung ilaw at ng binuksan ko yung ilaw..
It was full of dust and webs.. Ba't kaya di to nilinis?? Oh i forgot,, Di pinapalinis ni ate yung room ng parents namin,, Kasi syempre privacy nga diba..Speaking of ate,, I miss her..Lahat ng minamahal ko namamatay..Petmalu din si lord noh?? Wow i can still joke at this state..Oh well
Nag libot libot ako ng room ng parents ko.. Puro pictures namin yung nakahang sa wall,And my napansin ako na painting..
It's a shipwreck,,It's very weird to place something like this on a bedroom...
I miss my family so much..
Then napatigil ako sa pagiisip ng nabungo ko bigla yung cabinet..Then i got so curious, Binuksan ko yung cabinet and it was full of notebooks with numbers in it..Binuksan ko yung notebook,,Oh this is my mother's diary, lahat nakalabel kung ano yung nauna..
May nakalagay na numbers..Then hinanap ko yung "1" na nakalagay sa notebook..Nahanap ko at binuksan ko yung nasa pinaka first page neto..
Dear diary,
It was a very tough day,,Mahirap talaga pagbuntis..Hays di ko magawa ang mga gusto kong gawin. Then while i was walking around our village.. i just bought a milk and bread from the store nearby,,Some strange old woman came to me and spoke,, "Do you remember me??"..I'm not sure if i know her..She seems poor because of her ripped clothes.."Uhm sorry no" I said politely..Then she gave me a shipwreck painting..Well i don't know what it means but i took it and i said "Thank you but what is this for?"..She answered me,, "Thanks to your mom, even if you don't know me,, I owe something for your mom..Hmm I see that you're pregnant, Good luck with that baby" then she smiled and left..Does her "Good luck with that baby" is a good luck or not? Parang negative yung meaning niya nun but at the same time when you heard it it's for good luck..Then i just walked home and placed the painting on our bedroom..I miss speaking tagalog, Dito kasi sa Canada wala namang makakaintindi sakin pag nagtagalog ako diba? I also miss my husband which is nasa hospital ngayon..Mahirap maging doctor,,Minsan pag nakain kami sa labas may tatawag sakanya na kailangan siya dun para sa isang urgent surgery..Well i think that's all now..
