Eye of Prophecy

Chapter Sia: Don't shoot the Messenger. And Why Can't We All Just Get Along?

Chapter Sia aka Chapter Six:

"What do you call a Fairy that hasn't taken a bath?" I looked between the two tense Fae that stood staring at me as if I were about to suddenly sprout another head.  I didn't get an answer from either of them—not that I really had been expecting one.  "Give up already? Stinkerbell." I snorted,—the expression on their faces hadn't changed.  I sighed.  "I know, I get it, it was a hard one.  Maybe I should start off at the primer level.  You know, like jokes for Dummies, or knock knock jokes.  I mean, it was stupid of me to think you guys knew who Disney was.  Or, hell, ever even watched one of the ancient classics.  I'm guessing you don't get cable out here...uh, satellite? No? Yeah, didn't think so."
"Tein beag, what in the Green Goddess are you talking about?" Caed suddenly asked.  That adorably cute befuddled expression was back on his handsome face.  In addition, Mr. I'm-too-sexy-for my-armor, Cael, Fairy guy, was just looking at me like I was some kind of desert he wanted a second helping of.  Neither of the looks was instilling a deep sense of confidence in me.  Plus they were fucking with my already totally f**ed up libido."
    "Caedmon?" Handsome Cael Fairy spoke. "Is this some Earthen speech that I am not caught up on yet?  I have tried for Talaleaigha to learn Earthen, but I'll admit...mayhaps I am not as current as I would like."
I rolled my eyes.  "Yes, I am speaking lowly Earthen.  Well, wouldn't you know it, I am a lowly Earthen, shocking I know, right? Hey," I looked first at Caed and then at hottie Cael, "What do you say to your goldfish on its birthday?" I waited for a second before barreling on, "...have a fin-tastic day. Do you get it?" Their expressions remained unchanged. "Wow, tough crowd."
    "What is a goldfish?" Caed asked.
    "Do you have one? Do you celebrate its day of birth?" Cael added.
    Well...okay then. "Uh no. I don't have a goldfish. In fact, I don't have any pets. I can barely take care of myself...hell, I can't imagine trying to take care of myself and a pet."
    "Pet?" Caed and Cael asked at the same time.
    I looked between the two. "Uh, yeah.  A goldfish is a small uh, fish.  Anyway, lots of humans used to keep them as pets.  A pet is an animal that you take care of and love and...well...guess serves as a companion, a friend of sorts."
Caed frowned.  "You keep animals as...friends, and they are what is the word..." he thought a moment before adding. "Chan e fiadhaich? Chan eil iad a 'gluasad bheathaichean?" (1)
I laughed.  "Yeah, no.  They aren't wild, they're domesticated.  And no...no they are definitely not shifters." I laughed harder as I imagined one of Alpha Main's boys curled up on a dog bed in the corner of my crumbling cottage. 
"Do you not raise the goldfish to consume?" Cael interrupted my musings.
"What?"
"The fish you spoke of.  Would you not be keeping it to...eat one day?"
I blinked, then shook my head slowly.  "I guess, technically you could eat a goldfish.  But no, humans kept goldfish as pets, uh not as a food source.  Trust me, they were tiny little things...you wouldn't get much of a meal from one."
"It seems impractical," Cael murmured, "...to keep a fish but not to eat it."
"Na, what is impractical is wasting good time and coin celebrating the aquatic creatures day of birth—unless it is of the shifting folk then I understand—"
"Guys!" I yelled.  "Why are we still talking about this? I already told you, I don't own a goldfish, and I don't celebrate its birthday, hell I've never celebrated my own birthday, why the heck would I celebrate a stupid fish's birthday," I ended with a huff.
"We will remedy that situation tein beag," Caed said with a smile that transformed his already beautiful face into a thing of true indescribable beauty.
"Uh-no, that's okay.  Trust me, I don't need to celebrate the day I came into the world."  Yeah, I'd rather forget the day all together.  I had lied a little.  Growing up my family did celebrate my birthday, well in their way.  They tied me down, cut me up, had my blood spill into a ceremonial cup, after which my folks and my crazy brother would drink my spilt blood.  And for the grand finale, they would kill one of members living on The Compound, never someone older than 16 and always someone of magic, but not too magical—it wouldn't do killing someone who had the potential to breed another Legacy.
I shivered involuntarily at the memories, and stiffened when I found Caed's arms around me, he had brought me into an embrace.  I should pull away, I really should.  But fuck, it felt nice.  And, wasn't I allowed to enjoy this moment, well for a moment?  I allowed myself to lean deeper into his embrace, turning my head and resting my cheek against his chest. 
I caught a glimpse of hottie Cael and swallowed.  Oh yeah, I had almost forgotten about the fact that there was another hot Fae guy in the room with us...another hot, angry, Fae guy.  Angry? Oh yeah, he  was definitely not a happy Fairy camper right now. 
"Uhmmm..." I tried to extricate myself from Caed's embrace.  He wasn't letting me go, and it was like trying to dislodge magically infused steel two by fours.  "I...uh...can you let me go now?" I peeked up at him.  His face was beautiful and stony. 
He shook his head.  "Nay.  Something upset you.  I could see it on your face.  And I will admit I did na like to see you...upset.  I am comforting you, tein beag."
"Well, that is really uh, nice of you, and I appreciate the thought, and your concern, trust me, you feel great and fuck if you don't smell amazing, better than waffles with—" Holy shit.  Shut up Delphine.  You just told the egotistical Fae King that he smells great.  I noticed now, Caed's expression was no longer stony, but soft.  That beautiful smile of his had returned.  Great.  Trust my verbal diarrhea to amuse him.  I took another quick peek over at hottie Cael, if anything, his expression had only grown darker, and it was like I could feel the tension radiating off of him.  "Okay, Caed," I used his name, "You have to let me go now.  Your uh buddy over there, he looks about ready to lose it.  And honestly, I'm running out of jokes and for some reason I don't think you guys will fall for my diversionary joke tactic again."
Caed sighed dramatically, but eventually loosened his arms and allowed me to step out of his embrace.  "Those were supposed to be jokes, tein beag?  Are jokes not supposed to be amusing? Is that not their purpose?  Yours were not amusing.  I think you must be mistaken.  They were not jokes."
"Well, excuse me Your Majesty, I didn't realize that you were the expert on jokes.  I'd like to see you do better, and hell they worked—" I cut off and shook my head.  "No...listen...we are not going back to that.  Let's just leave it at, you are both calm—" I looked over at the still fuming Cael and cleared my throat, "—well calmer...and move this party along. And before you ask what party I'm talking about, no there is no actual party, it's an expression."
"How did you know I was..."
"...Because I've spent enough time with Tala, and you guys to get it," I said, not letting Caed finish. "You still don't understand all my quaint Earthen expressions. You take some of them waaaaay literally. So, yeah, no actual party, just an expression meaning can we uh, move things a long?" I took another step back from Caed, my eyes still trained on Cael. "You going to be all right there, big guy? I don't think we were properly introduced." Yeah, I needed to stop referring to him as Mr. Hottie McHot in armor Fae Cael guy, in my head. I made a move to get closer to him when a growl stopped me in my tracks. I looked over at Caed and sighed when I saw his now thunderous expression. "Oh come on, give a girl a freaking break." I rolled my eyes. "I would get stuck in the room with the two insane Alpha Fae, because God just hates me like that. Caed, I was just going to introduce myself to your friend, remember, your friend! And probably shake his hand."
    "You can introduce yourself from where you are currently standing, tein beag. In fact, you can move over here," he pointed to a chair that was about a foot away from his right side. "And I will introduce you, no hand holding is necessary."
    "Hand shake," I muttered, but didn't move to take the seat.
    "Come here, sit, tein beag."
    "No. I am not a dog."
    "Of course you are na a dog. I know you are na a dog."
    "Oh really?" I raised my eyebrow. "Come here, Del, sit, stay, Del." I cocked my head to one side and sniffed. "Again, you don't tell me what to do." I ignored the chuckle coming from Cael.
    Caed shot him a dirty look. "Tha thu a 'gàireachdainn an-dràsta mo charaid. Cha bhi thu a 'gàireachdainn nuair a bhios i a' giùlan leat leis a 'chànan sin geur aice." (2)
Cael's chuckled deepened, and seemed to hold dark promises. "O tha mi a 'creidsinn gum toigh leam a cànan geur ann an dòigh sam bith bheir i dhomh a bhith ga fhaighinn." (3)
My mouth dropped open in shock, outrage, and okay...a little interest.  What? He was hot and making innuendos.  I wouldn't be a living, breathing woman if I didn't have a bit of a reaction.
    I shook my head to try to clear it of the hot images running through it and then shook my finger at the handsome Fae with a smug expression on his face. Great, because Caed wasn't bad enough.
    "And my sharp tongue won't be doing anything with yours, mister." Oy, that didn't come out right. I sighed. They were going to give me an aneurism. Well, if I died right here and now I wouldn't have to deal with the trip from hell through the crazy manic Fae Portal.
    Caed clenched and unclenched his hands before speaking. "Earthen, Delphine, may I introduce you to my former friend Gaurrdo Bach Cael Aidan Sariel."
    I nodded. "Okay, well, I'd love to say it was nice to meet you...but so far I haven't gotten a lot of the nice part. And why the hell do you all have so many damn names?"
    Cael laughed. "Gaurrdo Bach is my title, meadhan-oidhche milis, (4) my name is Cael Aidan Sariel. But you may call me, love."
"She will call you dead," Caed hissed, "if you do na stay that tongue of yours."
I rolled my eyes and nodded. "I can't believe I'm about to say this, but yeah, you need to stop it Casanova. You're just asking for a smack down."
Cael looked affronted. "You think he could take me? He may be King but I..."
"From me jackass! If anyone delivers the smack down, it be me." And whatdaya know, I rendered him speechless again.