Dormiveglia
(n.) the space that stretches between sleeping and waking
Harry leaned in to look at Louis, to study him, but Louis weakly pushed him away. "Stop. I don't want to get you sick," he mumbled as he closed his eyes, biting back a cough. "God, I sound horrid" he mumbled.
"A bit, but the raspiness suits," Harry responded."You sound downright lovely with your rasp."
Downright lovely? Louis mumbled. "Don't you mean sexy?" He weakly grinned and wiggled his eyebrows before another cough stopped him in his tracks.
"Ugh," he managed once he stopped coughing. "I may sound lovely but I feel horrid, Harry."
"I know," Harry responded softly as he rested his palm on Louis's forehead. "I wish I could make you feel better."
Louis responded in a low voice, not making much sense as he leaned into Harry's touch.
"Is there anything else I can do for you?" Harry asks.
"Yes," Louis replied before he paused and shook his head. "No."
"Which is it?" Harry asked with a soft laugh."Yes I can or no I can't?"
Louis didn't respond and Harry frowned.
"Louis?"
Louis opened his eyes and he looked at Harry.
"I want you to hold me," he whispered. "But I don't want to get you sick." He coughed again before shifting away from Harry's touch as to not pressure his decision.
"The last thing I want is to be the reason you're sick, Hazza."
"Eh," Harry replied. "If I get sick, you can take care of me," he said before he sat down on the edge of the bed, wrapping his arms around Louis as he pulled him into a gentle hug.
Louis chuckled softly as he pressed his face into Harry's neck, completely relaxing into his
grip as he did so.
"That's not the proper way to go about thinking, Harry. And besides, you're the better caretaker. I can't cook and I can barely do the rest of all of that right."
"Oh god," Harry replied as he laughed. "You'll just constantly bring me tea and offer to order takeaway. The flat will be in shambles by the time I'm better." Louis laughed into Harry's neck before he started to cough again, trying to pull away so that he didn't cough on Harry and make him ill. Harry kept him locked in his arms, refusing to let Louis move until the coughing subsided.
"Sorry," Louis mumbled as he rested his head on Harry's shoulder again."But in my defence you wouldn't let me go so I had no choice but to cough on you."
"I didn't want to let you go," Harry responded softly as he used an arm to pull Louis closer, simultaneously smoothing down his hair as he smiled.
"I don't mind your germs, Louis."
A moment of silence nestled between the two of them before Louis shifted and looked at Harry, smiling quietly as he did so.
"We are so domestic, you know that right?"
"Of course," Harry responded before he smiled. A flash of panic registered in his brain but he ignored it."Just the way it should be."
Louis pressed his face into Harry's neck and mumbled something about being tired, leaving Harry to chuckle softly.
"Go on and sleep, then," he told him as he lightly rubbed his back. "I've got nowhere to be."
Louis was asleep before Harry had even finished speaking and as he held Louis, listening to his raspy breaths, Harry realises that he had fallen hard for this boy. He watches Louis' eyes flit about under his eyelids as he dreams and watches how his long eyelashes rest against his cheek. He marvels in the beauty that is Louis Tomlinson before the image is torn from his eyes as he blinks awake.
He stumbles out of bed and finds his way to his mums kitchen. He had gone to stay with his mum for a while, just in case Louis went to Harry's to find him. Harry knows this is only part of the reason. He also knows that if he stayed where we was, close to Louis, he wouldn't be able to stay away. At least this way he is an hours drive from Louis. When he turned up her the door, without Louis, his mum had given him a concerned look before letting him stay, no questions asked. It just had to be Harry's luck that when he finally finds the kitchen, his eyes adjusting to the darkness, that his mum is sitting at the kitchen table, nursing a cup of tea. Another thing that stabs at his heart. It's just tea, he tells himself and sits down next to her.
"Harry, are you alright?" His mum asks worriedly.
"Yeah, yeah. Just a dream" he waves her off, getting up to pour himself a glass of water before sitting back down.
"A bad dream?" She asks.
Harry shakes his head, a sad smile plays at his lips.
"No, a good one." He whispers.
His mum stares at him until he begins to get uncomfortable, before she finally speaks.
"Then why are you crying?" She asks gently, cupping his cheek with one of her warm hands. He jerks his head back in surprise. He wasn't crying. Was he? Harry swipes his face with the sleeve of his long sleeve t-shirt he had pulled on.
His mum turns in her chair and pulls Harry into a hug which does absolutely nothing to make him feel better.
"I just miss Louis" he says quietly.
"I have to ask you this because I love you ok? Where is he?" She says playing with his curls whilst his head stays on her shoulder.
He pulls back from her embrace and runs a hand through his hair.
"I....I err........I left him" he mumbles.
"Oh Harry" she breathes and he doesn't look up because he knows the look that she has on her face. A mixture of pity, understanding, disappointment and worry. He can't stand that look.
"I don't know what it was that made you like this. I don't know if you watched something when you were younger or read something or......I really don't know but all I do know if that you can't be scared of love. You shouldn't be scared of love." She says gently taking one of his hands and squeezing it.
Harry already knows what has made him so afraid of love but he won't tell her, he can't tell her. He knows he shouldn't be scared but he is, he's absolutely terrified of love.
"When you get it right, love is the best thing in the world. You've just got to let yourself fall." His mum continues and Harry looks up at her. She isn't looking at him though, he follows her eyes to the fridge and -oh that's what she's looking at. A picture of his sister Gemma, him, his mum and his step dad Robin. He sighs. That's the problem, he isn't afraid of falling, he thinks he already has, how can you not fall in love with that boy from Doncaster? He fell for Louis the day they met when he was all curls and dimples and Louis was dressed in stripes and braces, but no that's not what's wrong. He's afraid that Louis won't be there to catch him
