I successfully got on to the train and found my seat number. It was at the extreme back, close to the window.
I sat down and realized all other passengers had luggage or bags but I had nothing except my little hand bag.
After I had settled in I started thinking of my mum.
My mum is my everything
She is such a hard working and strong woman
I am who I am today because of my mum.
I know y'all must think the same about your mums but my connection with mine is different
I tell my mum everything
Next to Ayman as a best friend I have my mum.
Those awkward girly thing I can't talk to Ayman about, I tell them to my mum. Everyday we dream of me going to school and becoming a successful doctor who takes care of her patients and parents.
Can you imagine that not happening
I need her to see me succeed so that she'll know all those years she wasted taking care of me wasn't in vain.
Momma
My eyes welled up again and once again I started crying but I was cut off by the sudden movement of the train.
I normally get motion sickness the first few minutes.
I rested my head on the window pane and let the tears fall.
"Are you still crying??" I heard a familiar voice say
But i shook it off
All the guys are on their way back home by now.
I'm sure.
"Laila..." the voice sounded closer than before. I then felt hands on my shoulders.
I raised my head to look at who was disturbing my cry.
"Guys... I've seen her
Just get to the very last carriage" He said to the person on the other end of his phone.
"Chuck?"
I looked up and noticed his black shirt as he had his phone pressed against his ears.
How is he here?
What is he doing?
"Gashi(take)... wipe away your tears" chuck passed me a handkerchief from his left breast pocket
"What are you doing here..." I sounded awful
"I am...we are here for you "
He said while sitting down next to me.
"Huh?"
We??
"Don't worry she'll be alright..I promise "
He gave me a tight squeeze on my shoulder
And for some reason I felt slightly better
He took my hands held it in his
And gave me light rubs against my skin that made my nerves gently fade away
"Kun iso??(have you arrived)"
He said over his phone
He must be talking to the guys and directing them to come here.
The guys really came here for me
I'm speechless
Soon Haidar appeared in front of us .
His eyes quickly dart to chuck and my hand.
They had this silent communication but Chuck stood up and Haidar took his place right next to me.
"Thank you.." I said to Haidar
He only looked at me and nodded.
The handkerchief Chuck gave me was in my left hand.
Haidar collected it and
Before I knew it
He started wiping my face
"Ohh you don't make a cute baby panda.." he said gently rubbing the cloth over cheeks
As they fired up!
"Too much mascara??" I said
"You think.." he had light humor in his tone.
He had his two palms on my face they could actually cover my entire face.
Gently he wiped my mascara off
And I just sat there dumbstruck
I noticed how today his eyes where off a different shade.
The so called eyebrows were not as bushy as I remembered
His lashes looked super curly as the side burns looked well kept coupled with his cap he looked good damn fine
He stopped when he noticed I had been staring at him .
"I can do it my self! I'm not a child"
I tried to escape
"But you look like one.. as of now an ugly one"
"You said I'm cute now I'm ugly?"
"Just don't cry again...I can't manage your face then"
Don't cry again why was I even crying
And for a moment I totally forgot about the reason till it came back flowing like a river into my memory stream.
Once again I felt tears
But then I heard "don't cry again"
And I stopped
I tried to hide my face and a placed my head back on the window.
I noticed how we passed by so many trees, shrubs and river channels on the way
Time to time we passed human beings.
I started to loose track of time as I felt sleepy once again
Gently I felt my eyes close.
"Your neck will hurt"
Haidar carried my head from the window and place it of his shoulders.
I pretended to be asleep.
This is too awkward should I pull back or??
My head rested against his chest, I was sinking in as his warmth made he feel better.
But still a few tears managed to leave my eyes and stain his shirt
He must know I'm awake now
"You know I don't blame you for crying this much"
"Just the thought of loosing my mum would have made me the same"
"So don't worry.... it's alright
She's gonna be alright
Inshallahu"
I simply nodded against his body
"I'm about to lose my mum too.." he started
What does he mean my that
His mum is healthy from what I saw last time.
"I love her so much but she is making this hard for me"
"I told her so many times this is my life and this what I want to do..."
I kept quite
I don't say a single word
"I love music but I also love me family.. .. why do I have to choose between the both of them??"
"Then don't.. you can have it all" I finally spoke out pulling myself from the comfortable position to look at him.
"I can't" he trailed off
I was expecting him to say something else but he kept quite
Maybe he liked it if you were asleep
I realized my mistake and went back to my window
I can't make him talk it's his personal life matters
Who am I to interfere?
"I have to choose in 6months"
The words came out gently
In 6months he has to choose either what he loves the most or his family.
I suddenly feel sad for him.
He avoids eye contact I'm sure he is wondering why he told me all of this right now.
He barley knows me and I am sure I know more than some of his close friends.
I didn't know how to comfort him I wanted to return the favor, so I pulled him into an embrace and snuggled into his chest.
I felt him tense up a bit but then relax
"Then you'll decide what's best in half a year" I said to him
"Half a year...oh wow
I have half a year to end my career or my relationship with my parents"
"Tough luck.." I said in between yawns.
I finally fell asleep. I have lost a large amount of water today.
Soon I had Extra weight placed right above and I assumed it's Haidar's chin resting on my head. He must be dozing off too.
This position was quite ...........
~<~~~~~~~~<~~~~~~<~~~~~~<~~~~~~<
