klance oneshots

Happy

a/n: this is gonna suck but oh well
(please don't kill me)

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LANCE POV:

It's the middle of the night and I can't sleep. You know that feeling you have when you feel everyone in the whole world hates you and would probably be better off if you didn't exist. Yeah, that's how I feel everyday. Like i'm not worthy of being part of Voltron. Like they could replace me and they wouldn't even remember who I was. I'm just that kid who says stupid jokes and flirts with everyone. They would never believe I'm unhappy. Who would, with this stupid mask i've put on no one would think, "You know, Lance always tells jokes and flirts around but, have we ever seen him be serious. Maybe he is hurting inside." Ha. Like anyone would say that. No one has time for me. Shiro's to busy, Keiths fights all day, Pidge works on her computer, and Hunk and Coran could help me but. No i'm just in everyone's way. I'm the seventh wheel. I doubt anyone would notice if I was gone.

I sigh. I reach my hand under my pillow and my stomach flips. I promised myself I wouldn't do this again. It's been a month since that day. That day I felt so worthless. So worthless.
"No, I can't do this again." I say to myself louder then I thought. I have the knife in my hand. I'm shaking so hard and tears are running down my face.
"I can't. Not again." I say quieter. I just need to put the knife back under my pillow and fall asleep. When I wake up, I'll put my fake smile on and go though the same routine. Yeah, that's what i'll do. I try to move but as soon ad I do Keith opens the door.
" Hey Lance, were you talking to yours- " he pauses as soon as he sees the knife. It's on the ground but i'm still shaking and i'm pretty sure if Keith is as smart as I think he is, he'll put this together.
"Lance." Keith has his head down. He's frowning. "Were you gonna cut yourself.." he stars saying but I cut him off, "Haha, no why would I do that! I found a knife and when you opened the door you startled me and I dropped it. Hah, I'm such a klutz. Silly me." I start fake laughing and plastering that stupid smile on my face. Keith walks over to me. I stop laughing and he looks at me. He looks angry for some reason. Then he does it, he slaps me. 

Tears pour out of his eyes when I look up at him. I hold me cheek and stare at him.
"Hey, what was that for." I say again with my fake smile. Please just go. Leave, I don't want to start crying in front of him.
" Lance tell me the truth. Did you really try to cut yourself. " Keith looks at me with tears. Why is he crying. He wouldn't care if i died, no one would.
" Do you really think I'd do that. Who would be the life of the party if I died. Hahah. " I hate this fake act I put on. I hate it so much.
" LANCE TELL ME THE TRUTH. STOP JOKING AROUND. I KNOW YOUR HURTING SO JUST COME OUT AND SAY IT. " I stare at him.
" Fine." I say with me my head down. "I'll tell you then. I was thinking about killing myself. I have been ever since I can remember. No one cares about how I feel. I'm just the sharpshooter who flirts and jokes around. I'm the seventh wheel and maybe if I died you guys would be able to fight better. Maybe if I disappeared - "
"Don't say that Lance." Keith says cutting me off. "I don't care what you think is right. Killing yourself won't do any good for the team. Your part of this team. Your part of Voltron Lance. I'm sorry if it seems like everyone's ignoring you it's just. There's so much happening. But Lance, this isn't your fault."
Tears are falling down my face. All I ever wanted to hear was I'm a part of something. That's all. Keith leans down and gives me a hug. I feel all negative emotions flow out of me. I smile. This is all I wanted.
"Sorry for slapping you." Keith says.
"It's ok, mullet." I say with a genuine smile. I feel my mask breaking. My fake smile fading. Keith laughs and pulls me closer. I laugh. This time, it's a real one.