TSPH: Critique Shop

@monzuki23

Author: monzuki23

Title: Better Than Revenge

Genre: Fan Fiction/Romance (PG/SPG)

Parts: 70 (on-going)

Critic: annachan268

Ps. I'm harsh so beware. Though, hindi naman masyado pagdating sa iyo kasi natuwa ako sa kwento mo. Halatang passionate ka sa pagsusulat pero may pagkatamad. Hehehe.

Pps. I'm sorry that it took a month before I posted this. Hehehe, nagkaroon po kasi ng issue dito sa amin, personal issue to be exact. Anyway, I hope you understand.

Warning: There are spoilers ahead. I suggest that read the story first before proceeding with this review. Thank you for understanding.

Disclaimer: This is only my personal preference. You are free to react and clarify some things about your story and my critique. Please forgive me for the harsh comment I'll state in this review.

Cover

Your cover is an okay for me, especially the PNG.

However, para sa akin, masyadong magulo tingnan ang mga fonts sa cover mo. 'Yung font talaga ang problema dahil para itong sardinas na pilit ipinagsisiksikan sa isang lata tapos pinalala pa ng colors. Ayos lang sa bandang PNG ng mga karakter mo dahil maayos ang pagkaka-input nito. Sa font lang talaga kaya naman it is either fix all the font or change your whole cover. Hindi kasi nag-blend ng maayos ang mga font — such as its colors and positions — kaya ang messy niya tingnan.

I suggest you to our own graphic shop. Magagaling sila and I'm sure kaya nila ayusin ang iba pang mali sa cover mo. Just visit our profile and look for TSPH: Graphic Shop, hehehe. Yeah, nagpo-promote lang but I'm telling you the truth because they work professionally.

Anyway, tanong ko lang din kung sadya ba ang pagkaka-lowercase ng title mo, ha? Ayos lang rin ang title mo. Intriguing so I look forward to your story's plot.

Description

Maganda ang description kung emosyon ang pagbabasehan pero magulo ito kung technicalities ang titingnan.

First issue, capitalizations.

We should always capitalize the first word of our sentence. We should capitalize the word 'I' too, and also the proper noun like names or subjects (Park Yhung Sik), places (Metro Manila, Philippines), and other proper nouns. But always be careful, don't capitalize the word that were not stated on those rule.

Second issue, punctuation marks.

Quotation mark ("..."): We put a quotation mark if there's a text that is directly cited or to show that a word or phrases is being used in a special way. So, if the text that being cited is not yet done, don't put an ending quotation mark yet. And also, it only consist two quotation mark to indicate the beginning and the end of a quoation. Beginning at end lang, walang middle, okay?

Ps. The three dots between the quotation mark is called ellipsis. I represented it as the imaginary words between the quotation marks.

Apostrophe ('): We use apostrophe to indicate the omission of letters or figures such as 'can't' because we shortcut it from the word 'cannot'.

Hyphen (-): We should always use hyphen when we repeat words like this, 'iwan-iwanan', 'mag-boyfriend-boyfriend' 'dahan-dahan', and all the other iterate words. Also, we use this when we combined tagalog words to english words like this, 'na-confined' or 'tag-lish' and two tagalog words as one like this, 'mag-abang', 'tig-isa', 'nag-aaral', especially if the first letter of a word collide to the last letter of a prefix.