How The Hell?!

War Child

Tord was in the field again the blue army. He wasn't shot but there was a pain in his abdomen. He pushed naturally like he had to a shit but a baby came out instead!
The end

Nah lmao

Bullets whizzed past, the sound of rapid gunfire ressionating throughout the area. Popping up briefly to contribute to the raging waves of gunfire, he narrowly missed being shot through the head, a bullet grazing his cheek. Ignoring the sting of dust entering his wound, he let loose a few more rounds before ducking for cover once again. Leaning back against the sturdy stone remains of a thick stone wall, he winced in pain. This was no time to be a weakling and flee from battle, so what if it felt like there were bullets going through his abdomen. Popping back up from behind his cover he found himself lacking ammo and the pain becoming sharper. Glancing to the side he saw a downed soldier, his body laying in the middle of an opening between stone walls. On his feet in a flash Tord dashed across the opening, grabbing the ankle of the corpse and pulling it behind the other piece of crumbling stone. Removing both the ammo and weaponry from the downed body he reloaded the weapon before popping back up and letting a few more rounds out. Grinning as he saw the enemy soldiers collapse, he nearly did the same. The pain in his gut was stronger and came much sooner than the last.

Watching as his comrades ran forward to get into closer range of the enemy, he followed close behind. Feeling a sharp pain running up his leg he nearly collapsed, instead dashing for cover. Pulling up his pants leg he let out a small groan. Reaching into one of the pockets of his uniform he pulled out a knife and bandages. Keeping his hands steady, he bit his lip to suppress the loud cry in pain from trying to dislodge the bullet. Wrapping over his upper calf he sighed in relief before flinching in pain. The feeling in his gut hadn't left but had gotten worse. Feeling an urge to push he grew confused, refusing to listen to his body.

"S-stabssersjant Larsin." Hearing his rank called he glanced over, looking at the other man.

"Korporal Haugen what is wrong." Instantly recognising his friend and comrade, he questioned why the other looked pained. His own body continued to try and force him to bare down on whatever it was trying to dislodge, him refusing to listen. Noticing bullet wounds on the other's forearm and upper thigh he quickly switched positions with the other, removing the other's coat and pants to reach both wounds. Removing his own coat he bundled it up and shoved a large part of it into the other's mouth before setting off to work. Using the same knife that he used on himself after wiping the blood off he started with the arm, hearing the other give a muffled scream as he dislodged the bullet. As he wrapped some gauze over the bullet wound he felt the inside of his pants become wet, the spot only barely showing through the fabric. Flinching as his own pain grew he forced himself to ignore it. Doing the same with the thigh wound he wrapped that up as well. Hearing the other soldier sigh in relief, he picked his gun back up and shot at a few before leaning back against the sturdy stone again. He felt his breath hitches as his insides wanted to shove out. Finally listening to his body, he felt something large move down through him. Holding back a groan he tried to keep calm as whatever was in him moved further down.

"Larsin? Is something wrong?" Feeling a hand on his shoulder he glanced over to his friend. Groaning softly he pushed again, the feeling of whatever was coming out almost stretching him.

"I am fine. Let us meet back up with our comrades and finish this." Standing shakily he ran forward being followed by the lower-ranking soldier. Letting loose a few rounds every few yards he traveled, the duo met back up with their group. Tord squatted down among the rest of his battalion, his lower regions stretching slowly to let the thing come free. Pushing softly he felt whatever it was get stuck halfway out. Nodding as he receives his orders he ran out from the cover and took his place at a corner, shooting and killing anyone nearby from the other army.