Friend To Lover - Steve x Bucky

Chapter 5

Bucky's POV
For a while I was aware with my surroundings. Fighting with Steve and suddenly feeling my entire body freeze and go numb. I don't remember anything at all until I started to run, and I ran until I came to a place where even the light could not find me. I stopped to catch my breath with my heart thumping painfully against my chest. As I straightened out stars started to dance before my vision. I couldn't see much but the place I was in was another alleyway. It was dimly lit by a flickering light and I was supporting myself against a brick wall. Blood was pounding through my ears and I couldn't focus on anything as my entire world started to spin. I thought about what would happen if I died right now. If I died, it would probably be from malnutrition. Hydra never gave me enough food to keep up my strength, but just enough to keep my alive. But then again, why would you feed a monster, or a worthless cause? Hydra hasn't fed me for a week and a half and with the serum I need twice of what the average person's food intake would be. This would be a really appropriate place to die for me. This is exactly what I deserve. To die alone, in a cold, dark place. Behind me I hear a can slightly shift and I can hear someone quietly curse. I spin around and am greeted by the worrying eyes of the one and only Steve Rogers. But the sudden spin made my head feel like it was ready to explode, and before I can do anything, I fall to the ground and am consumed with darkness.

Steve's POV
Seeing Bucky leaning against the wall was bad enough. The way he acted was even worse. His breath was labored and he seemed so terrified of me. It was when he fell to the ground when I realized how emaciated he was. i had mentioned before how he was always elegantly thin, but now he looked like a walking, gaunt skeleton. As soon as he passed out I rushed over to him and turned him to face me. His face was completely pale, and the blood was quickly draining from his face. I picked him up with only one goal in mind; bring him to my apartment. When I moved him I was so put off by how light he was and I realized how badly treated he was. Now that he was almost completely colorless, you could see every mark on his skin, and it was horrible. Regardless, I carried him through all the back alleys to avoid being seen until I got to my apartment. I walked inside and gently lay him on the couch, not wanting to disturb him while he was resting. I turned on the heating, and so the color started to return to his face. I left out a breath I didn't know I was holding as I saw him beginning to stir.
Suddenly, he bolted upwards, eyes rapidly scanning the unfamiliar room before his eyes settled on me. His breathing calmed down but he continued to shake. I took a slight step towards him with my hand outstretched, showing that I didn't mean him any harm but this was not the reaction I was expecting.
He flinched so violently that he almost fell of the couch and his breathing started to pick up again. His eyes flashed with so many emotions bu I could only decipher a few of them.
Fear, abandonment, guilt and pain.
These were all things I couldn't bear to see him with so I tried with a different approach. I slowly moved towards him, so I wouldn't frighten him until I came to the couch. I gingerly sat down, waiting for his reaction. He slightly recoiled and tried to curl in on himself as if to protect himself. I put my arms around him and just hugged him, because for seventy goddamn years I wasn't there to protect him and for seventy years I let horrible men give him a lifetime of unfortunate reflexes. I didn't register it at first but when I did I almost jumped for joy. Bucky slowly wrapped his arms around me and held me tight, as if to make sure I didn't disappear again. I hugged tighter as a felt a few tears fall. I almost gasped out loud. In the years I had known Bucky, he had never once cried and it broke my heart to see how desperate for human contact my best friend was. We stayed like that for a while, and when we pulled apart, we both fell asleep next to each other and the last thing I remember thinking was: "I will fix him, no matter what it takes."