Spillin the Tea☕️

2:What future?

I'm a grade 11. That means I'm supposed to know what I want to do already, what career path to pick and shit. I thought I wanted to go into paediatrics but I don't like children as much as I thought I did. So now I'm going into law.

I began to love law because I had it first semester. My teacher, Ms.Marco, taught like she was telling us stories. I loved it. I also sat next to one of my closest friends ever. I met her last year in science, but you'll read more about that story in a future blog. The part that sucks ass is the fact that I have to take biology right now. I tried dropping the course so I could have a spare, because I rather focus on my other courses, but if I'm being completely honest my boyfriend also has a spare that same period I have biology and it would've been nice to be able to chill with him on a daily. That wasn't my main focus though, because regardless of why I want to drop it, my average is barely over 50%.

I wanted a good stable future and I thought I had one when I wanted to go into paediatrics but that's changed. Who knows, maybe it'll change again from law. I'm just done with it, and I'm genuinely scared that I'll have no future.

Am I the only one with this concern?

The worry and fear of the fact that I'll be good at nothing and I won't be able to find a job. I won't be able to keep a roof over my head, or put food on the table. I don't want to be the richest girl out there, I just want enough money to be happy, to be able to buy things that I like.

Maybe it's normal to feel this way, but all I know is that it fucken sucks and I would gladly have it any other way.