Author's Note
Picture of Dylan Roberts to the side
Dedicated to narutolover21 because she was the first person to reply to my author's note and her comment made my day. She was also the first person to add this story to her reading list. Thanks so much.
Chapter 18
Dylan Roberts is Not a Turd
After I gobble down my Coco-pops I return to the first story of my house in order to return my bowl to it’s rightful home in the kitchen.
Again I pass the den and I notice that there is one less voice in the cacophony of snores coming from my living room. How sad- they were downgraded to a quartet.
I get over it and march onwards to the stylish kitchen my mother designed with its cherry wood cabinets, black granite and stainless-steel appliances.
As I walk through the doorway I come face-to-face with my brother and sister recreating a battle from world war one. Okay- so maybe I was over-doing the hyperbole but seriously this was not a pretty sight.
Cassie is red in the face and Pete looks murderous and defensive.
“How dare you invite him into this house?” Cassie demands pointing her finger into Pete’s chest.
“He’s my friend…” Pete justifies.
“Yeah. Well he is my ex.”
“So?”
“SO!?! What do you mean ‘so’? Are you even aware of how awkward it is to wake up after a well-deserved sleep in, with your hair the size of Mount Everest and your face not washed only to run into your ex-boyfriend who was invited to your house by your dumb#ss brother.”
Pete glares.
“No, I don’t know what that is like. Because I am not a dirty pig who leaves my room without going to the bath.”
“IT IS A SUNDAY!!! I don’t do this any other day. Stop trying to change the subject. The fact is you invited my ex to our house and on top of that you didn’t warn me!” Cassie cries out, “I ought to chop of your little friend over there and barbeque it for stray dogs. Except that they will still be hungry coz their meal is so small.”
Ouch. Even I felt the sting in Pete’s manhood from that one.
“Well I am sorry that I have to ask for your permission every time I have someone over. You need to stop freaking out. Also, if you touch my BIG buddy I will drain you of almost all your blood and give the rest to charity whilst hoping they except blood from Satan’s spawn.”
Okay- this is enough. I need to know why my family is fighting like cats and dogs.
“You two are destroying insults for me,” I say calmly, ”the art of a good insult is keeping it short and sweet.”
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