Dandelions are Flowers

No Prize to be Won

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry...

Do you think this is easy for me?

Both of you, stare into each others eyes. Do you see the person you once loved, or do you see the person you want to hate?

I know that I don't hate anyone. I don't even hate the people who held my heart in their hands and snapped it in half. I know that I can't.

Why?

They are my parents.

I became the chain linking two separate hearts. When one heart traveled one way, the other traveled the opposite. I had to stretch my arms so wide I thought they would fall off. But...they didn't. My parents wouldn't let them.

Little did they know, my heart was still in two. Each parent would tug on the other half like a rope, trying to get it to cross their side. It didn't matter how hard they pulled, one piece would never cross that line. I am no prize to be won.

Soon, there was a schedule between when I would see each parent. Though this became part of our new routine, it only seemed to cause more conflict. There would be times when I would have to choose one parent over the other. The parent I didn't choose would get so mad at me, I thought their head would burst.

No matter what happens, I never feel better about myself.

Why do you have to make things so difficult? Communicating to the other parent through me? Complaining to me about the other parent? Trying to convince to me that the other just isn't good enough?

Do both of you even consider how I feel?

I feel alone,

I feel hurt,

I feel disheartened,

I feel stuck in the middle.

And it's all because you can't admit your faults. 

You can't forgive, or understand.

All you two know is to argue.

And I'm sorry, but I'm not going to put up with this anymore.

I. Am. Done.