Iniquity: a tale of guilt and love || Completed

23. Twisted tangles!

~ when you are hurt, you are scared~ to trust, to love and to live~

Shravan stood leaning over the basin, breaths ragged as he hyperventilated. The memories that had pained him over the time now pained more when returned altogether. A muffled cry escaped his lips, even though he tried hard to hold that in, but failed. Hurriedly, he opened all the taps and the shower, trying to mask his own voice, his own cries. This was one thing that came naturally to him, hiding behind closed doors with a tangible pain ripping him apart. He sat down in the shower stall, his long legs stretched in front as his entire body fell limp, paralysed from the ache that was threatening to swallow him. What had he done? What had he become? In his quench of love, and a little belonging, he realized today that he had become somebody diffrent altogether, somebody even he didn't recognize. Sobs left his frail body as the realizations set in, and even though he had tightly clasped his hands over his mouth, the girl outside had heard it anyway.

Suman was sitting on the bed when she heard a sob, her senses alerted at the sound. A few seconds later the sound of running water filled her surroundings, but suman now knew not to trust what looks at the surface. She ran towards the washroom and barged open the door as always to meet the most heart breaking site of her life. Sravan sat on the washroom floor, his face in his hands, as he cried bitterly and Suman felt like life was sucked out of her. She ran to him, slipping on the water but somehow handling herself to not fall, and sat beside him.

" Shravan?", Her voice came out in between her own hiccups, and Shravan looked up at her, to find tears streaming down, but it was today that he realized they were for him.

Leaning over, he kept her head on her chest and suman in a reflex wrapped her arms around him, both paying no heed to the water drizzle that fell upon them like heavy rain, for they both hoped to wash away their sufferings with that same rain.

" I can't do this anymore Sumo. This is not me. I didn't want to be this person", Shravan spoke, and suman wiped his eyes, they had started to get a reddish hue now. She turned off the taps and the shower and pulled him up, standing on her tippy toes to wipe his face and hairs. She patted his cheeks and neck with the towel, and turned around to come find him a T-shirt and tracks when his hand stopped her and pulled her back.

Shravan Malhotra had accepted it late, but his heart knew from the start that no matter what, he can never see Suman Tiwari Malhotra in distress either. So he wiped off the water from her tresses and face, and a smile broke on Suman's face. A genuine one, after days of anguish. Sharavan could see the innocence in the smile, and a very faint smile broke on his lips too, before they both moved to change.

A few minutes later, Shravan and Suman were standing in the centre of the room, looking at each other. Suman could bear the silence no more, and she held his hand in hers before looking up into the eyes of her 6 feet 4 once qutub minar.

"Shravan, you made mistakes. I agree. You hurt me, I agree", she stated and she could see him wince even at her words.

" But Shravan, I hurt you too. I made you disappointed too. I did not fight for you, for us. It's my fault too...", Suman cupped his cheeks as he stared at her, unblinking.

"What happened, happened. It was some twisted game of destiny, let's get over it. Let's move on Shravan, together", her expectant eyes bored into his hesistant ones, where she could clearly visualize an ocean of insecurities. But there was one more emotion, the one that scared her- anger.

"I wish it was all that easy sumo, I wish I could move on just like that", he sighed as he removed the hands from his cheeks.

"There is this anger in me, towards Papa, for m-maa, for you, for destiny. It is making me bitter everyday. This hurt, that my own family have inflicted me with, this sheer helplessness! I am going crazy Suman", he shreiked and Suman instantly held his hands. It scared her, the intensity in his eyes. He was loosing it all, she could see that, and she desperately wanted him to feel a little hope in his bruised heart.

"It's okay Shravan. Life isn't that bad", she rubbed his nape lightly earning a sardonic chuckle from him.

"Yeah, right. Life isn't bad", the flicker of emotions in his eyes gave her a hope that he himself crushed the next second.

" It's not bad, it's worse than that", he spoke with gritted teeth, and Suman instantly hugged him, tight.

" Let it be Shravan, let it be as worse as it can be. But we can strive together to make it good na, and we will. I am there for you", she rubbed his back softly, and kissed his cheek simultaneously. Shravan's eyes welled up in response. It was the first time she had verbally spoken it to him, that she would be there for him.

Suman broke the hug as her thumb wiped the tears that had managed to escape his eyes, while a soft chuckle escaped his lips. At one side, he said he was angry and bitter while on the on the hand a soft and tiny declaration of companionship brought tears to his eyes.

" I don't care what happened Shravan. All I care is what is going to happen. And I want us to be together facing that, alright?", She aksed like a mother asks her child to do something good.

He nodded at her, albeit unsure how they were going to fight the baggage of so many years and so many lies.

"Lets start with going home?", Suman questioned again. She seemed to be doing the talking today, not that she minded but she also wanted him to put forward his own opinions. But, he simply nodded again.

Suman sighed. There was a long way to go, and maybe she would have to walk ahead to clear the thorns but she was determined to do anything this time, at any cost but she would not let him slip into the same hellhole of loneliness and guilt again.