Poems From My Soul

that pretty young woman

*trigger warning, sexual assualt mentioned* At the age of 7 she walked into a 'homey' room filled with furniture and throw pillows and as i sat across from a pretty young woman i noticed a mirror, a double sided mirror because no, this was not a normal room, and no this was not any woman. At the age of 7 i sat across from a pretty young social worker, a woman who would continue to ask me about the men who victimized me, about the men who saw my tiny 7 year old body and decided it was normal to 'jerk it', and this woman, she decided it was my fault, that i, a innocent child was asking to be sexually assualted online. She sent me away with tear stained eyes and blood stained wrists. At age 14, 7 years later, the effect of that pretty young woman had destroyed my innocence, my existance, and with still blood stained wrists, tear stained eyes she went searching for a comforter, a blanket to stop this aching heart, this solo flier who couldnt look her grandmother in the eye, nor her mother, her father, her very own sister. Someone to hold her still and reassure her, she found the most beautiful moth, she loved him so, and he loved her body. She had confused her lover with another man, a man who once again say her underage body and decided it was okay, a man who took advantage of her poor broken heart. And since he had known her so well now, he knew she had no where to run. She cried while playing with her body just to make sure he wouldnt hurt her. But nothing worked. One sunny day she awoke to a bing!  And heard his voice ringing in her ears as he told her in his 'sexy', raspy voice that since she proved herself she got to be his slave, his cum rag, his toy, his. And she was stuck, she couldnt run and no one would trust her. That pretty young woman became the reason she was abused for 2 years. The reason she would hear "one day im going to fly you here, tie you up and let you become our incest little slut, we'll have youre kids getting you pregnant every 9 months" that pretty young woman became the reason she had 10 suicide notes and blades hidden within every wall, every creaky floorboard. That pretty young woman, the woman who made sure, she wouldnt save her but destroy her. And steven fucking kellogg, you my dear, made sure you did the same damn thing, you made sure id never feel safe sharing my body ever again.