The rest of the day past in a blur. Dean messaged me a few more times but he must have given up because of the lack of response he got from me. When Monday arrived I didn't want to leave the safety of my bed and have to face... Him. As I walked into school I was surrounded by my friends all asking how I was. I said the usual answer of "I'm fine. Don't worry" I smiled and that relieved some of the tension. I guess I'm better at hiding my feelings then I thought. I asked how everyone's weekend was but was stopped mid sentence. Christian was walking out of the school with a dog trailing behind him. I looked down and kept walking. Why did he have a dog with him? I wondered, but it didn't matter, I told myself.
"Oh my god. I am so sick of maths! I swear it's so annoying!" I was half listening to Taylor complain about how difficult linear equations were as we walked out of maths class, when I saw Christian standing with a teacher and a girl I didn't know across the courtyard. Taylor noticed my staring and looked over to where Christian was. "Whoa! He looks good!" I tensed and gave her a look. He did look good, but then he always looked good to me. He wore jeans and a singlet showing off his muscled arms and torso. I tried to smile and covered her eyes, making a joke out of it. "Okay, okay" She laughed and said sorry. I looked back over at him. He had his bike with him and looked like he was leaving. I looked at the girl he was standing with. She had dyed blonde hair and a tiny figure.
"That's Amy" I heard Taylor say. "Gianna said that he has been in love with her since he first saw her." Jealousy took hold of me and I clenched my fists, digging my nails into my palms, I looked away and tried to focus on something else. A few moments later Paige and Olivia joined us and when I looked up to greet them, Christian and Amy were gone.
"So are you going to the music room today?" Olivia asked while opening a packet of chips.
I nodded and got up. "I'll see you guys later" I was half way there when Taylor came running up behind me. She wanted to come and listen and I didn't have a problem with it.
Walking into the music room, I felt my palms sweating and my heartbeats were insanely fast. I had never been in the music room so I looked around. I was quite a large room with windows all around me. I could see the infamous smoker's area, where Christian and his friends hang out. I tried to avoid looking in that direction. There were cords everywhere and 3 microphones in the middle of the room. Off to the side was a small blackboard, a red drum set and a black keyboard.
Mr H told me to sit at the keyboard and warm up my voice and to calm down after seeing the panicked look on my face. Taylor sat on the other side of the room next to a large desk and smiled at me encouraging. Hr H left the room and I placed my fingers on the keys. I took piano lessons when I was younger. I stopped taking lessons after moving to the city and never took it up again. I wish I had though. I wish I could play an instrument.
I started doing some scales. I only did the major scale from C but I did it over and over with different vowels. II took a deep breath before each scale calming myself. It worked. When Mr H came back he brought a microphone from the middle of the room and placed it in front of me. He asked me to sing something a cappella. Anything I wanted. My mind went completely blank. I tried to remember lyrics but nothing would come. I remembered my last singing class and picked a song from that class. I took a deep breath and started singing softly and away from the microphone. He motioned for me to sing louder and closer to the mic. I moved closer and tried to get louder. My hands started shaking again and so I held them in my lap. I finished the song and he left and told me to keep singing as loud as I can. As soon as he left I looked at Taylor. She looked amazed and she smiled at me. I laughed and kept going. For those few minutes while singing I forgot everything. The only thing I focused on was the music. I felt happy and I didn't want to stop. It felt so good to smile and laugh and be myself. Christian is turning me into someone I don't want to be. I thought back to how I emptied the medicine cabinet. That is not me. I would never even think of doing something like that. But I pushed the thought out and asked Taylor what I should sing next. Of course she suggested Taylor Swift. I laughed and started singing her favourite Taylor Swift song.
