┌
美的
┘
I didn't expect to see the other side. When I did, I was inevitably shocked. No other beauty can compare to what I had seen at that moment. It was like a change in life that will never have such a strong impact as this. It was different, but a good different. I gulped taking in the sight. I tried to stay in the moment knowing I wouldn't get another chance such as this. I knew I was pushing my boundary, but I still kept relishing in the sweet scent of lemon, and the fresh, warm air.
Was it too early to enjoy this feeling? I kept thinking I didn't deserve this feeling, but I'm selfish. I want this feeling, and I want it all to myself. It is my fault that I can't always have this satisfaction that I, oh so desire. It's my fault and I can't take it back.
I waited patiently. I will continue to wait for him. Yes him. He's the reason I have held on so patiently, subsiding the pain growing. The other day I was walking down the bridge near our place. The place we met. I wished to see him, and so I did. He was at the bridge, staring to the other side. I wouldn't interrupt, he needed that time. It's his last time. I want him to remember me, to not forget the moments we had.
Will you remember me after you leave me? Will you be in pain as I am? I don't want you to be in pain, but I want you to care about me too. I'm sorry I'm selfish, but I want you all to myself and that's not going to change. Even if you leave me, I will always be there.
The two perspectives is what they wonder. Do you love me? Will you forget me? Questions asked, not so subtly, doubting the other. Yet they really are in love, they really are. They think. How can love be doubted? How can they love if one is willing to leave and forget the other. How can one submit completely to the other while the other doesn't care. That isn't fair and lately; he also thinks it's not. Fairness isn't fair for both of them right now, and it won't be for a long time.
"Do you love me?"
"Do I have to?"
"Ah I guess not?"
It's not like he expected a loving reply. The latter is a real douche, but his feelings are too caught onto him, and he can't live them down. He feels as if at every turn he gets nowhere, as if the latter doesn't love him, but he really doesn't know that the latter is completely in love with him as well. The latter is not the best at expressing his emotions, but his love is true and pure.
i love you.
