Random emotional texts

Why?

Why does it still hurt?
It's been weeks, I'm supposed to have been better.
I don't want these feelings. I hate them. I hate myself for having them.
But.. I can't ignore them. It hurts too much.

People keep bringing it up as if the topic wasn't finished, as if something else was meant to happen.
I don't understand.. all I want is for it to be over. Finished. Done. So I can move on and drown these feelings to be forgotten.

Or maybe I do want these feelings.. just without the emptiness.
How is it possible to feel so much pain but be empty inside at the same time?!

• • •

It feels like my emotions are suffocating me but the emptiness is eating me from inside and I'm not sure what will kill me first.