Phan Oneshots

Six Months

(HERE YOU GO :D)

I remember the day Dan left, it was a Tuesday. He left the house at 5:02am, too early for his liking. It's been two months since he left. He really didn't tell me why only that he needed time alone. So he went to Florida, away from London, away for me. I didn't think it would hurt this much but there's a hole in my heart that's too big to fill.

"Hey Phil!" His face shows up in the computer making a lump form in my throat but wave back and smile.

"Hey Dan." I say smiling. He started talking about how fun things were and people he's met.

"You would love Thomas! He's awesome." He says a big smile on his face. I couldn't help but feel a little hurt.

"I bet he is." I smile trying not to show how much I wanted to run away from the laptop.

I looked at my friend, his face was bright and filled with happiness that it hurt. For years I was the one that helped him, the only one that got him to crack a smile. I was Dans support and now he didn't need me anymore.

"Yea like yesterday we went to this place and it was so cool, I don't remember the name but I had so much fun. Then we went to eat and the food wa-"

"I'm sorry Dan I need to go." I interrupt not being able to stand it anymore. I wasn't normally jealous I don't know why this was getting to me.

"Yes sure I'll Skype you somewhere next week" he smiles

"Yes," I smile back "don't forget."

"Never."

I haven't talked to Dan Howell since then.

~~~~~~~~~~

*Four Months Later*

It's been four months since I've last talked to Dan, six months since he left me here in this flat alone. It's not the same anymore. The piano misses his fingers, the kitchens always messy because there's no one to close the cupboards when I leave them open. This place is practically screaming for Dan.

I've been sitting down for the majority of the morning before I decided to finally clean the house.

One hour later almost everything was clean except for the kitchen. I was having a fight with a stain on the floor that refused to come off when I heard a voice behind me.

"Phil?" I turned around to see Dan standing there in front of me.

"Goddammit not again" I mutter under my breath. Since he's left I've seen him everywhere. Walking past the bathroom door when I'm brushing my teeth. His shadow by my open bedroom door. Him sitting in the lounge watching the television.

"What are you talking about Phil?" 'Dan' asked me.

"Please leave me alone" my voice quivers. I hate the fact that I miss him so much that I imagine he's by my side.

"Phil. It's me Dan!" He says trying to grab my hand but I move away.

"No you're not. You're just some made up image in my head! The real Dan is in Florida having the time of his life!" I yell tears threatening to fall. I spin around and run to my room slamming the door closed.

"Phil! Phil, please open the door!" 'Dan' shouts banging on the door. I close my eyes and will myself to sleep.

"Sleep, sleep, sleep and it'll go away" I whisper to myself as I let go of reality and sink into dream land

~~~~~~~~~~

I wake up to find that it's dark outside. Hesitantly I step outside and into the lounge to see Dan on the couch.

"I'm going crazy." I mutter as I run away.

"Phil! Wait!" Dan cries touching my arm.

"How the hell are you touching me?! You're fake just a hallucination." I say getting away from his grasp.

"No Phil it's me really! I came back from Florida!" He says moving his hand to my shoulders and shaking me a bit.

"You chose now to come back?" I ask my fear turning into anger.

"I-"

"Four months Dan! You haven't talked to me in four months! And you just dump your ass over here like you own the place! Maybe I was worried! Maybe I have gone crazy Dan! And you didn't think once to CALL me?!" I say angrily.

"Phil I-"

"I don't want you lies Dan! It took you six months to be 'alone'?!" I exaggerate quotation marks around 'alone'

"Phil plea-"

"No! I've been worried sick Dan! But it's not like you care! You're just out having fun with your new friends."

"Goddammit Phil I'm back aren't you happy!?" He shouts. I take a step away because I don't know if I am happy.

"I-I-" I turn around and walk to my room. I don't close the door I just sit on my bed head in my hands.

"I'm sorry Phil." Dans voice pulls me out of my thoughts.

"I should be the one that's sorry. I didn't mean to sound so...angry. I just, I'm confused, so confused." I whisper

"About what?" Dan asks making me look at him.

"It shouldn't have hurt that much when you left." I whisper tears rolling down my face.

"Why didn't you tell me? I would have ran back home if I knew." He looks at me eyes filled with concern.

"But you were happy and you deserve to be happy Dan. It would have been selfish of me to ask you to come back."

He looks down as if thinking about something.

"Dan?" He looks up startled.

"I-"he sighs, "Phil I should tell you the truth. You deserve that much. I-god I just- Phil I didn't leave to be alone...well not completely. I just-god why is this so hard. I w-wanted to forget you" he says looking down.

"Oh." I whisper yearning to run out the door.

"No! Not like that. I mean I-I wanted to forget my feelings towards you Phil."

"Feelings?"

"Yes Phil, feelings. But obviously I failed. I tried so hard because I wanted to keep our friendship. Nothing worked Phil! Nothing! You were always stuck in my mind! I couldn't get you out." He whispers the last part before he looks at me.

"If it helps, I couldn't get you out of my mind either." I whisper tears rolling down my face. His hands cup my face wiping away the tears. He looks at me and I lean in pressing my lips to his. After a few minutes we pull apart gasping for air.

"I'm never leaving again" he whispers hugging me tight.

"I'm not letting you leave"