You're Never Alone

Five and a half

Part five and a half: moving on

"Hello, Yoongi. It's been a while. I haven't been able to come due to the weather or just the craziness of taking care of our babies."

Jungkook arranges the flowers on the tombstone. He had cleaned it before placing the flowers. It has been a while since he last came to visit his husband. Jungkook felt the need to come but hasn't found the time. Today, he got lucky because it was just him and his two boys. Both were unusually quiet.

"You can meet our babies. This one is Yoongi. He looks so much like you and some times even acts like you. Complete opposite of Hoseok but they get along well. They got each other's back. Sometimes they gang up against me when I want them to do something. I wonder if today...if you played a role on their behavior. I've been meaning to come." Jungkook paused. He looked at his children and kissed their forehead.

"Say hi to your papa," he whispered in their ear.

"Hello! I Hoseok-ie. I hobie you okay."

"I Yoongie-hyung. I hobie you okay too. Appa wanna play." Yoongi turned to his appa.

"Give me a minute, Yoonie." The boy seemed alright with waiting that short amount of time. Both boys remained in his arms.

"These are our babies. They remind me of you. I haven't forgotten about you and I never will. I'm trying to move on and I think I'm doing well. Jin—you remember him? He has something planned. I think he wants to propose...Yoongi? I'm going to say yes. I love him. Maybe it's too quick or something long overdue. I hope to have your blessings with this. I'm ready to move forward and I'm doing it the best I can. I love you, Yoongi. Always will." He kisses his hand and placed it on the tombstone.

"I miss you."

Jungkook kept looking at the tombstone. He wanted to say more but his chest felt heavy. The feeling of losing him was there but it wasn't as painful as before. It was bearable.

"Say goodbye to papa." He told his boys. The boys said their goodbyes. They stood up and Jungkook carried both his sons. It was time to leave.

"Bye papa." He saw his boys wave. He turned back and saw nothing. Jungkook wanted a sign to know he was doing the right thing. But dead people don't come back from the grave. He would just pray that Yoongi knew that he truly loved him and that with Jin it wasn't the same but there was something special. Yoongi has to know that.

Yoongi knew him. Jungkook would have to be at peace. He was sure Yoongi would bless him if he could. It's just not possible when he's wherever he is. He's no longer in this world.

Bye Yoongi.

April 7, 2018