Sabr: The Sword Of a True Believer!

Chapter 13: Dammam

Zuhaib was dressed casually in his blue jeans and a White Tee with a cartoon bulldozer on it. He took of his sunglasses and hung them on the intersection of the neck of his Tee.

He was quite excited to meet Ammar after such a long time. Ammar was working in India and hadn't visited Damman since the past four years. And now he decided to shift back to Dammam and continue his life in his parent's house as he used to.

Zuhaib was waiting for Ammar at the arrival gate, when he accidently bumped into someone. The girl was neatly covered in her Abaya like any other girl there, but this one was a naqaabi too.

Her grey eyes glared at him from her Niqaab giving him a look-before-you-bump-into-others look. A navy blue purse hung on her shoulders.

Zuhaib mumbled a sorry and moved on his way. He found Ammar waving at him from a distance. Zuhaib sped towards him and pulled him in a tight hug, he literally had tears in his eyes. He wiped them off and pulled himself back.

"As Salam alaikum ya akhi!!! How have you been doing?? How's Sana and the kids?? When are they coming here? Oooh! Ammy baby I missed you so much. I have tons to tell you. I felt lost having none to share my thoughts to, I asked Suhaib to visit us, but due to Rumi's treatment he couldn't come over. I am glad that you're here." Zuhaib finished it all in a single breath.

"Wa alaikum as salam lil one!! Everyone is doing great by Allah's grace Alhumdulillah. Sana and the kids will be coming here by the end of this month In Sha Allah. Chillax Zuh...Have faith in Allah and everything will fall in the right place. All of us know what you've been through for this long, just wait a little long, and you'll find Allah placing you in a place you've never imagined to be, a place where there will only be happiness...Now boy!! Lets get home...I cant wait to have the yummy food aunt Maryam cooked for us!" Ammar was usually a happy-go-lucky man. But at times he would say things that can make you wonder where he learnt from. He was a happy man, always grateful to his Rabb, a loving brother, a caring husband, an amazing father of two and a righteous man.

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Manha took out an old black diary from her bag. There were few other diaries in her bag, dating from the year 2005. Since then, she poured out her heart in her diaries,everytime she felt it difficult to explain herself to people she spoke to her diary and thus transformed a bunch of papers into a part of her life.

She randomly turned the pages of the diary until she saw a page where the ink seemed to be spilled. She traced her fingers on the dry page and read it.

23rd June, 2008:

You brought a smile to my dried lips, you cheered me up in a glimpse, you cried even more when I wept, And then...then you left.

You made me believe the world is so good, you trusted me like nobody ever could. You soothened my soul, shared my heft, And then...then you left.

You made yourself a part of me, surprised me with your majesty, Then everything in a flash, you swept, because then...then you left.

I'll stay quiet because I am aware you lied when you said you cared. If I was wrong in what I believe, Then...then you would never leave.

Her eyes were turning moist, she swallowed the lump of her throat, her stomach was swirled. It seemed like it was yesterday she wrote it, and today she was completely different.

Back then, she was always disappointed and had tons of complains, she always thought low of herself and was ungrateful. But with time, she learnt to see Allah's mercy in everything that happened, now everything made perfect sense, all that she lost was never hers to be kept and that loss was a source for her to return back to her Rabb, the only one she relied on, the only one who actually loved her.

She smiled at herself and started with her Dhikr. She utilised most of her free hours in the remembrance of Ar-Rahman! Because she was now well aware of the fact that it was only Allah who had been for her, and with whom she should spend most of her time. She found her soul at ease when she talked to her Rabb, she knew that she could talk anything to him and he would hear all of it with love and patience.

Nine years had passed since the dreadful incident, but the memories of that terrible night still sent a shiver down her spine. Everytime she thought about it, her father's tired face and swollen eyes appeared in front of her eyes. Her mother's disappointed and worried eyes haunted her throughout the day. Amidst all these, her faith on her Rabb remained firm. She knew that if her Lord can brighten her life and protect her when she was a grave sinner, he definitely would pull her out of the darkness and beautify her with his noor now, when she tried to
abstain herself from any wrong doings, when she tried her best to please Allah.

She was highly upset and disappointed when Jamaal let her down and betrayed her. She was broken from within, her heart was shattered into millions of tiny pieces, which seemed impossible to be ever fixed back together.

She remembered well what happened that fateful night, the call which ended her belief on men. She felt her herself being loved for a moment and then being smashed without a second thought, she heard the whispers of her crying heart, and though many tried consoling it, she wasn't convinced. But then she realised that He was just another chapter of her life, which have already been revealed. Now it was time for her to open the next chapter and relive her life as usual. She knew it would be difficult, but she cannot spend the rest of her life resenting him or cursing him.

She realized that, not everyone she love will stay, not everyone she trust would be loyal, some people only exists as examples of what to avoid.

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As Salam alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakutuhu!

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