Torn (Groffchele Story)

Breathe

Hey guys! This update is for Kate because she asked for me to update so here it is! I go on holiday tomorrow so wont be able to update for a week! (I’m going to Italy for the first time so I’m mega excited)

Lea POV

It had been several days since I received the call from my team, and yet my body still felt numb. My skin was dry and irritated and my hair had never been in a worse condition before. But I didn’t care. What was the point in anything anymore if I didn’t have the one person I wanted to look my best for and share my life with? My attitude was beyond negative but how could I be positive when I wasn’t sure who I was anymore without the person who seemed to make me whole. He pieced me together a few years ago and now I feel like I’m a jigsaw with one missing piece. The pain didn’t feel like it would ever go away. Every day I felt worse.

I knew everyone was getting more and more concerned the longer I remained silent. But I couldn’t deal with their speeches. I knew they’d all be giving me words of encouragement, telling me how it will get easier over time, I knew them well enough to know they’d tell me these things. They’d tell me what I think I wanted to hear. But I didn’t want to hear it. I just wanted him back in my life. I wanted him to hold me and tell me didn’t happen and I just woke up after some freak nightmare. But with every day I woke up and saw the shine through and once again at night I saw the moon I realized this was real life. He wasn’t going to come into our room and lay on the bed and wrap his arms tightly around me and hum into my ear a sweet tune he heard on the radio.

I felt movement in the bed. I didn’t bother looking up, it would only encourage whoever was about to try making me eat something or drink even a drop of lemon water. I felt someone reach for my hand, and hold it tightly against there’s. “Lee, baby you’ve gotta eat okay? I’ve left you some of your lemon water on the side too” it was my mom besides me. I hated being so cold to her but right now I couldn’t let her see me defeated. Though she already was. But I knew out of everyone she’d give me a fate talk and it hurts to think that she doesn’t really understand how it feels to lose someone. Her and my dad had always seemed so perfect. I just closed my eyes tighter and feel her gently walk away.

I felt the door shut and my eyes immedently released the tears that had been building as Ignored my own mom. I loved her more than words could describe but I just couldn’t right now. I heard the door open and sniffed gently. I felt someone’s hand rub at my cheeks gently with a tissue before pressing a kiss on my forehead. I looked up hopeful thinking it would be him. But it was Jon.

“Lea baby, your mom is so concerned about you. We all are” he sighed as he brushed his hand smoothly through my hair. He always had a way to calm me down and stop my tears. He knew everything about my moods and seemed to control me best when I wasn’t ‘me’ anymore.

I wanted to speak but I couldn’t. What could I say? The truth was I had so much I wanted to say but no words could come out. I had a thousand speeches pre-pared but none were suited. None made sense except from inside my mind.

“Lee, you remember when we first met, and everything?” he paused. “The first time I saw you cry it broke my heart. Like actually broke my heart. You were so vulnerable and I couldn’t do anything to help you. But I watched you slowly bounce back, all you needed was a hug and a very large wine glass” I couldn’t help but let my lips curve into a smile when he said that. I remember that week so well. It was over my last boyfriend. He had broken my heart and Jon was left to fix me again.

“Lee, I know you’re scared, we’re all scared, but I’m here for you? I’d never leave you. I can’t promise anything but for this moment in time I’m yours” he kissed my cheek and curled his arm around my body, holding me tightly in his embrace. I missed the way Jon hugged when we weren’t together. “I know the reason you’re not speaking is because you don’t want this to be real but the sooner you realize it’s happened the sooner you can grieve” I hated how he knew he so well. I hated it.

“I’m not asking you to talk right now, but if you could eat something that would at least get your mom to calm down and stop walking up and down ranting in Italian” he laughed and I couldn’t help but let a giggle escape before nodding my slowly against his cheek. It was the first time I had made eye contact with anyone in a week. His big eyes staring back at me made me want to melt into his chest again. I knew he felt bad. I put my hand out and began to chew slowly on the random selection of food my mom had put together. It was all of my favorite things on a plate, all healthy and yet filling.

“I’m so proud of you” he kissed the top of my head.