Scars Don't Heal - Transformers Prime (1)

Conclusion

[Amanda]

  I never expected this at all. I never thought I'd get involved with the war that consumed another planet so much it's core rotted and died. I never thought a part of me was actually a part of that same war. I never thought I'd allow myself to become close with anyone enough to let them know me. I never thought I'd get so attached to the Autobots or the new friends I made because of them.

  Truthfully, I didn't think I'd ever be the same. My mom's murder changed me in a way I never thought I could escape from. I cut everyone off, kept to myself, and allowed the darkness to consume me. I was alone and thought that was the reason I was still able to go on.

  If you're alone, no one can leave you.

  Oh how wrong I was. 

  What I didn't realise was that being alone was only hurting me even more. After I was sucked into this Autobot-Decepticon conflict, it hit me that my lonely reality could finally change for the better. Here were people and Cybertronians who were willing to look past my cold exterior to get to know who I really was. Optimus had said it perfectly;

  "Amanda, a leader isn't weak because they have to rely on their team. Their team is the reason they have to lead. Without the team, a leader is no one."

  So I let them in. For the first time since the death of my mom, I actually became a part of something more, and that scared me, even though I did everything not to show that. It had been so long that I had forgotten what fear felt like. Then I noticed how close knit we all became, Autobots and humans alike, and that reassured me.

  And that's when I realized something. Scars will never heal, but they can stop hurting. The scars that I have will never leave me, never fully heal, but they made me who I am. Without them, I doubt I would have been able to survive this long. When that realization hit me, my scars stopped hurting me. So what if scars don't heal?

  I didn't learn that on my own though. It was ironic that my constant fear of losing those around me was basically destroyed by letting people get close to me, and the one who made me really realize that was Optimus.

  The Prime was patient and he listened when I needed to be heard. He didn't give up on me when I tried to push him away, earning my trust and respect. He showed me how my scars didn't make me broken, but unique and special in my own way because I won the battles that left me scarred.

  I owed him; he made me the person I became after the change. I went from being the girl whose father left before she was born, the girl who watched her mom's murder, the girl who no one knew, to the girl who some saw as a leader, the girl who was called a friend, the girl who could be relied upon in trouble. Optimus was the reason I became that new girl.

  But now he's gone.

  And, though this all seemed so much bigger than me, I knew I would do anything to get him back. It wasn't until now that I realized how much of a father he became to me, he became the father I never had, and I needed to get him back.

  My name is Amanda Beckett.

  Though scars don't heal, I did.

  Now I'm stronger than before, so you better be ready if you want to stand against me.

End of Scars Don't Heal - Transformers Prime (1)