Fix You (Chanyeol x Suicidal Male Reader)

Art Festival

T/W: brief scenario/ mentions of a panic attack

As Toben and I make our way across the intersection between our apartment complex and the small festival, my phone buzzes. Since we can't cross the road right now, I decide to check it.

Yeol💖💖: it's gonna be a longish one today, maybe another 3 hours. Kasper is pushing us to our limits. At least this next song will have good choreos to go with it.

I reply with something along the lines of 'that sucks, stay hydrated, love you,' since I got too flustered by the light changing to green to write out a long message.

Toben and I swiftly pace across the two lane road to make it to the other side before the traffic lights switch again. We meet the other side safely and continue our way to the shindig.

The weather is so nice. It's warmed up a little since this morning on the roof, it's chilly, but not cold. The wind is still kicking hard. The sky is filled with huge, white clouds. It will probably rain tomorrow.

This is when I realize this is the first time in about two weeks I've left the house. With an incredible boyfriend who does all the shopping online and a job that doesn't require you to go anywhere mixed with severe depression, it's not the sweetest cocktail.

Almost as soon as we enter the designated area, I'm handed a paper explaining the reason why some old woman is making bags shaped like animals. I skim the paper, because I'm too nice, it's something about her being diabetic and her only remaining interest is animals due to severe depression.

Do I even have any more interests? Do Chanyeol and Toben count? When did everything that made me happy disappear? When did I stop caring? When did I stop watching my favorite shows? When did I lose interest in music and animals and games and memes and-

I can feel my heart starting to pound against my ribcage. My face twists into that I'm going to have a panic attack expression that you can't control. My legs feel so weak. Toben is jumping up on my leg. I speed down a corner in the search of isolation.

Lucky for me, the festival is only one road. I half sit-half fall onto the curb. I grab my hair in fists, pulling as hard as I can to distract myself from the anxiety.

Toben tries on multiple occasions to jump into my lap, but after the fourth time failed, he decided to scratch at my arms and legs instead. This dog is so good at getting attention.

I pull him into my lap and hold him close. He calms me down. I am so thankful for this dog.

I calm myself down some more and look at myself in the reflection of my phone to make sure I don't look too red and snotty. I fix my matted hair as best as I can, get a better hold on Toben's leash, and head in the opposite direction of the crowded street.

We walk an extra block straight to avoid even passing by the festival, turning right on the next street over. Two more blocks until the apartment building.

We make one block before we're stopped by two young girls, no older than 16. Their eyes light up when they see Toben.

"Can we pet your dog?" One of them asks me with her hand already made contact with his small body. I don't respond. These girls are lucky he's such a friendly dog. He looks like he's having the time of his life.

The one that didn't ask me whispers to her friend.

"He looks like Toben doesn't he? Same jacket and everything! What's his name?"

"Lucky" I lie.

"There's a idol who has a dog that looks just like him!" If these girls don't leave soon I'm going to have another meltdown.