Fall

Chapter Eleven

It’s the first day of summer and the greatest way to celebrate this is to wake up late. I looked up at my clock, saying that it’s 2:30 pm. I refuse to do anything today, but I decided to go out of the bed to have snacks or something. As I wander my eyes on my room, I noticed a lot of difference and a lot of stuffs added, too. But I think it’s cool. This should be the reason why I woke up late.

I glanced at the window, seeing children play and chit chat in the neighborhood. The sun’s sticking out but the summer air is nice. I noticed the photos hanging in my room, and the boxes on the side of my desk.

I saw the one that has note that says ‘open this every day, V.’ with my signature on it. Well of course I commanded it myself and so I started opening the box.

The box has sharpies in it, and a journal, a polaroid camera, and a voice recorder. I took them out and at the bottom of the box, there were lots and lots of pictures stored in.

Pictures of different people. With captions and doodles written on it.

The first thing I saw is the man with blue eyes, smiling; but not looking at the camera.

‘I like him’ it says on the caption. My heart started pounding and throbbing, my breathing getting unstable. Panic attack?

My hands started shaking, digging out all the pictures out of the box.

‘Louburrito’ the picture says and it was the same man with the ‘I like him’ caption.

Who is this? I don’t know any of them.

I started crying and sobbing, with getting dizzy and confused. I can feel my head cracking, as if it was being crashed with a big crane. I turned around and looked at the hanging photos, and noticed a lady with dip-dyed hair. ‘Lou, my bestfriend!’ Who is she? And why is my hair similar to her?

I continued to scan the pictures, trying my best to remember anything, but my mind is empty.  ‘Harry’

‘Zayn’ ‘Liam’ ‘Niall’ ‘Louis’, these pictures of the boys that I don’t even know.  I started grabbing a handful of my hair, shaking my head constantly and uttering the words ‘calm down, v.’ but it’s no use.

I went to the corner of my room, hugging my knees and crying in pain and in loss. I parted my lips, but nothing came out. I tried to yell for help, but no one heard me. I saw the darkness crept in my mind, throwing me into the hole of nothing. My demons started talking to me, eating me alive. No one seemed to care, and then I felt the world crashing down my feet, darkness dominated my eyes.

-

“Is she alright?” I heard a woman said, sadness and fear stirred in her voice. Mom?

“She’s alright, ma’am. She just passed out. Her head hurts, though, so I just gave her painkillers and a hot compress sitting on her forehead.” The young man answered. I tried to open my eyes, and I successfully did it. I checked out where am I, and thank god I’m in my room.

“V, baby! You’re awake!” mom said in almost a whisper, leaning closer to me and giving me a hug.

“I am awake. What time is it?” I asked, looking at her. she looked like she had a hard time on work.

“5:30. I am so sorry that I left you alone, sorry sweetheart.”

I tried to get up, but my head didn’t cooperate well and started to feel like an ass. I winced in pain, but managed to elevate myself, bringing my back on the headrest of my bed.

“Be careful honey. What happened? I just saw you in the corner, and I thought you just spaced out but you passed out.”

“Mom, I’m okay. Just a panic attack, that’s all.” I let out a deep sighed, and noticed the box again. I don’t know if I want to throw the box again, but my gut says it’s important. And I trust my gut. “Mom, can you bring me the two boxes there?” I asked, pointing at the box. She nodded and carried the two box for me.