Brian Saves the World, Maybe

Chapter 5B - Meet at the fountain

Brian stood looking at the fountain in the center of the park where they had agreed to attract an Observer. The day was overcast, with light sprinkles here and there, and he hoped any full onset of rain would hold off long enough to get this job done. He took the altered smart glasses off for a moment to wipe away a drop of water that had collected on the left lens. Putting the glasses back on, he glanced over at Dale, who was sitting on a bench about 20 feet away, trying to look natural. Brian fingered the device in his jacket pocket.

I hope this works. What do I do if it gets violent?

Observers were not designed to be violent, only to maintain a low profile and behave as law-abiding humans.

Yeah, and just sort of take over the world peacefully? Brian exhaled. Well, are we ready to do this?

Go ahead. Remember to get eye contact for at least 10 seconds. That should be enough time for the glasses to complete the scan.

Got it. Okay, here goes.

Brian flipped the switch on the device and held it in that position for 3 seconds, as TV had instructed. He then coughed, which was his signal to Dale that he had done so. Dale looked at his watch, which indicated he had heard it.

The signals were Dale's idea, but to Brian, they seemed wholly unnecessary and just made him feel silly.

How long do you think we'll need to wait now?

I would estimate between 15-30 minutes, TV responded.

I hope this isn't like roadside assistance, where the estimate for help arriving just keeps going up.

About 20 minutes later, a man in a brown jacket arrived. He was walking his dog, a German Shepherd. The man walked right up to Brian.

He nodded at Brian. "Nice day, isn't it?"

"It sure is," Brian replied, wondering if Observers liked rainy days. He tapped the button on his phone to trigger his smart glasses to begin scanning, and looked at the man squarely, ensuring that TV  would receive the full signal.

"Well, have a good one," The man said, and he walked away.

TV, did you get it?

Yes, the scan completed. That wasn't an Observer.

Brian looked skyward and sighed in frustration.

Dale stalked up and spoke quietly. "Was that guy an Observer, or was it the dog?"

"Neither," Brian said, ignoring the joke, "so get back to your spot."

As Dale sat back down on his bench, an elderly woman walked closely by Brian, startling him. He took a step back, and the woman walked a few more paces before stopping. She stood there about 15 feet from Brian for a few moments, looking casually around.

Brian approached her.

As the woman made eye contact with him, he pressed the button on his phone and said "Excuse me, ma'am. Do you know if it's supposed to rain?"

She looked at him for a moment with a blank expression before smiling warmly and saying, "I don't think it's supposed to rain until after dark."

This is the Observer, TV said. Try to keep her there for a few more seconds.

Brian quickly made a small hand gesture behind his back, alerting Dale. He then froze for a moment, realizing he was talking to an imitation human planted by aliens, and tried to think of what to say next.

The woman abruptly turned and began walking away. Brian tried to think quickly of what to do, when Dale suddenly darted by.

"Ma'am, did you drop this shoe?" Dale nearly shouted the question as he ran up to her.

Brian quickly walked over to Dale, next to the woman, and said, "Oh, that's mine." He added, "Thanks," then turned to the woman with an awkward grin. She looked at him for just a moment, and without saying anything, walked on.

I've got it, Brian. Good work.

Brian let out a deep breath, relieved it was over. He nodded to Dale, who he now realized was holding one of his own shoes in his hands. He looked down at Dale's socked foot and started laughing.

"It's called improvisation," Dale said, putting his shoe back on. Apparently the humor was lost on him.

Brian shook his head, still laughing.
What planet are you from? He thought.

I am actually from a small moon orbiting—

I was referring to Dale, Brian thought, cutting TV off.

I see. My understanding is he is from Earth.

Brian did a mental facepalm.