What Are We?

I

There's a saying:

What haunts us the most, are the words left unsaid...
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CHAPTER I

*Flashback*
"COME OOON!! WHO IS IT?!?!"

Gabriella half yelled while she was shaking me back and forth.

"NO WAY I'M NOT TELLING"

"Come ooooon. Pleeease"

She pleaded. She was really persistent about this matter. As for me, I had no intentions of telling her. I worked hard, no, I STRUGGLED to keep this secret; There is absolutely no way that would make me comply...

"Pleeeeease"

"Ughhhh, fine."

"YAYYYY" Gab squealed; she was getting really excited about this.

"Promise me you'll stay quiet? Don't react once I tell you" I tried to say it as firm as I can, but it came out more like a plead.

"Ok"

I took a deep breath and told her about how much I would regret this.

"Ok, here it is"

"Come oooon"

After moments of hesitation, I finally said:

"...uhm, I like Seth"

I expected her to scream or flip out or something; but, she only sat there and I remembered that I made her promise to stay composed...

**

Gab and I both laughed as we recalled that day.

Gabriella is my best friend, she's really awesome, and I look up to her. On the other hand, Seth was my guy bestfriend. We have a circle of friends which we refer to as our Squad. In this squad, there's Gab, Seth, Tim, and me.

It was a Tuesday afternoon, we had been eating our lunch at McDonald's after our scheduled review - summer review for the college admission test.

We were talking about our ideal type of guys. I was amazed with our current topic. If I were to be approached with this topic a few months ago, I would have listed that person in my blacklist. However, I've changed a lot, these past few months. Scratch that, a better way of saying it is: I was able to bring out the true side of myself.

"Lol, that's so true!"

"Riiiiight?"

We both laughed. Then, something came across my mind...

"Gab, hotseat"

"Lol Sandy, what's this about?"

"Just answer this question"

"Okay" she was uncertain.

"Have you moved on yet?"

She has an ex-boyfriend who was younger than us by a year. Recently, she realized that she wasn't over him yet and that sparked up the question.

"Hmmm..about 90% I guess"

" That's good. That's good."

"How about you? Have you moved on yet?"

"Lol Gab, I don't have an ex"

That's true though, I am an incoming 12th grade and I have never been in a romantic relationship. I'm not rushing it anyway and I was okay with this. Sandy Grey, NBSB - no boyfriend since birth.

"I wasn't referring to that. I'm talking about Seth"

"Huh? we're just friends"

"True, but you said you were going to move on from him"

I guess I did say that

"Well, it's not like I have to move on - technically, we were never in a relationship..."

Gab rolled her eyes

"You say that, but you flirt anyway"

Now it was my turn to roll my eyes

"Tell me, how many percent are you, in this moving on?" Gab asked, with an emphasis on 'moving on'.

However, before I could answer, she said

"0%?" Then she laughed hard

**
"Gab, I've made my decision..."

She just looked at me.

"I'm going to move on from him"

After I said that, she told me that it would be difficult.

"How would you do it?"

I told her that I wasn't sure. I knew one thing, for sure, though: I won't be distant from him. I guess the flirting part should stop. Even though we never flirted the way people define as flirting, I can admit that we minorly flirted at times.

Exempli gratia: we frequently exchange glances; Whenever we joke around with our friends, we slide in some remarks that only the two of us would understand. We spend late nights talking to each other; Once, we literally waited for the other to finish getting ready for bed, and we only bid goodnight when we knew that we were both in bed already.

"Well, I support you" Gab said, patting my arm.

"Thank you"

**
"Hmmm... 15%? I guess"

"Woooow that's so low!"

I just shrugged at that. I wasn't lying. I have to inaudibly shut my heart up from hurting when this matter comes up.

We strayed from that topic for a while, but we somehow went back to it.

"Ha ha" I laughed awkwardly.

"Lol, Seth's so funny! Aren't people always teasing him around his ex!"

"Waahhh, Gab, stop iiit. You do know that you're stabbing me right in the heart" I pleaded

I never liked it when people mentioned Seth's ex. Personally, I don't have anything against his ex; In fact, we're friends! What gets to my nerves, is the way he reacts whenever she's mentioned. HE NEVER FREAKING REACTS! HE DOESN'T SMILE, HE DOESN'T FROWN, HE JUST WEARS THIS POKER FACE UNTIL THE TOPIC IS CHANGED. I HATE WHEN HE DOES THAT! LIKE, COME ON DUDEEE I DON'T KNOW WHERE I STAND OVER HERE!!!

Despite my strong dislike on this matter, what I hate the most is: how much this matter affects me.

Every time they bring her up or tease him about her, I have to plaster on that smile on my face - knowing full well that my heart is shattering with every laugh they sound and every second he wears that annoying face.

"HAHAHAHAHA okay okay, I'll stop" she said that but she was still laughing

After she calmed down, she asked me in a serious tone:

"What is your most memorable experience with him?"

"I can't really decide. Hmmm... there are two things that popped into my mind"

"What's the first?"
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