bookworm ➳ a.i. (ON HOLD)

prologue

Flo

I've always had a love for books. They help you escape, you know? It's the best getaway, especially in tough, difficult situations. Despite my hatred towards education or literature whatsoever, I loved books, which was odd, according to my mother. Ever since I was little, I'd grab whatever book I could find and hide in my secret place in the attic of our old house, reading for hours, till the sun went down. That, of course stopped when my father passed.

My sophomore year in middle school was a tough period for us. My father recently lost his job and the stress in the house increased dramatically, leading my parents to constant fighting and screaming. Things were extremely tough, since my mother had stopped working when I was born, to raise me. As you can all imagine, we had no source of money whatsoever. I, of course, had my books and music to help me block the sounds away, and the attic was the everyday hiding place. Sometimes I'd blast the music on full volume, others I'd just read in silence, listening to the drops of the rain falling down the deep grey sky. Everything to get the noises out of my head.

It all happened so fast; my mother screaming in the living room, my rapid footsteps banging down the worn-out staircase, the agony pulsing in my chest. Then I saw them; my dad was standing in the middle of the living room, a gun pressed on his temple, the hand holding it being no other but his own. I've always known my father as a person who lost his temper extremely easy, but never in the world would I imagine a scene like this taking place.

One second, and everything was gone. My dad shot himself, right in front of our eyes. I wasn't worrying about myself, no; it was my mother who shook me off, crying and locking herself in the house for almost a month after the incident. I still had my books, but it wasn't the same without my father around. The house grew too quiet, and the atmosphere was suffocating. In school I've always been labeled as the 'odd one', so friends helping me through everything wasn't even an option for me. I had my books, my iPod and my sanity; that's all.

Day by day, my mum turned more bitter and strange, in a way. Her face had dropped and she never smiled, unless I tried to make her, spending hours on the task. I knew that even then it was fake and she was only doing it for my sake, but at least the tension between us eased just a little bit, and it made me feel better.

One day, everything changed though. I came home from school just to find dozens of boxes stacked up in the living room, with all our stuff inside. The house was practically naked, the colour had been scratched off the walls and every single painting or family picture or photo frame was gone. My mother appeared from the kitchen with formal clothes, gave me a straight look and simply said: "Get in the car, we're leaving".

After that, I never saw my home in Holmes Chapel, ever again.

In fact, we moved a thousand miles away. Do you think she'd set the whole scenery just for a city only hours away, like London or Sheffield? No, my dearest mother woke up from her misery, packed all our belongings in plain brown boxes and transferred our lives miles ago, in Sydney to be exact.

Yes, Australia. She just had to go that far.

We were no longer living in a big house, but a simple apartment in a building with ten more others. The city was already big and from the moment we set foot in here, I knew I wouldn't get along with the living rhythms. I was a rather calm person, unfamiliar to the loudness and stress big towns reflected, considering I'd grew up in just a small village-like place located in the countryside of England. Everything was new to me, and I wasn't growing any liking towards it at all.

Thankfully, my mother had the nerve to pick a place at the suburbs of Sydney, meaning our neighbourhood was quite small. About five minutes away from the house was a small library, which I discovered from just the first day. It seemed closed though, and I haven't checked for days. The fact that all the shelves were full of books made me wonder, and I decided to check again today or tomorrow.