I'm not fine at all / Luke hemmings fanfiction

9

[Rose's POV]

It's been three weeks and Calum hasn't talked to me since he found out about Luke. I can't even imagine when he finds out the dreadful things i've done with him.

Still do.

But this time, it's ten times harder.

How could I be so stupid?

I take another hit.

You did this to yourself.

I take a big gulp.

You deserve this.

"Maybe you should slow down." I turn to see Luke sitting next to me with his knees up and a bottle inbetween his legs with his hands around the lower body.

"Don't tell me what to do." I mumbled back.

He just laughed and took my bottle of beer away.

"Give it back." I spoke quietly about to cry.

"You're hurting yourself, Rose. Take a break." He turn to face me.

"I should've told him." I stare blankly at the cracks on the ground.

"I should've told him." i repeated myself but this time i could feel the tears forming.

"Look, calm down." His voice straight but i couldn't manage to stop.

"Rose, seriously. Calm down." I continued to cry and ignore him when a pound against the wall next to me quickly catches my attention.

"Damn it, Rose!" Luke raised his voice placing his head above the dent he had made before turning towards me.

"Stop acting like this, forget him. You have no reason to cry over someone like him-"

"I have plenty!" I snap back. "He's the only person that I could go to. He knows everything!"

"Everything, Rose? Really? How about the fact that your parents don't give two shits about you?" He tries to keep his voice steady.

"They care about me!" I scream which caused him to raise his voice even more.

"They haven't been there for you for the longest time and you know it."

"How the fuck would you know, Luke? You don't know anything about my past you pathetic asshole!" I try to stand and leave but i become light headed.

"You think i don't pay attention to the crazy shit you say when you're stoned out of your mind?" He steps closer. "You've told me how shitty your parents treat you and for the past three years of highschool you've been trying to get their attention by getting high grades, or joining a sport, but you know, that no matter how hard you fight it, you'll always end up remembering how they don't give a shit about you."

"Go fuck yourself!" I continuously slap his chest and break down into sobs as he pulls me into a tight hug.

He's right. No matter how hard I try i'll never seem to please my parents. They always have their minds somewhere else, and whenever i try to speak up they end up ganging up on me, acting like my opinion never matters.

I hate myself.