dark corners of the cruel world▪mitch rapp

♧ finally, the past: part 2 ♧

As soon as the door shut, she stood up and ascended the stairs to go to her room. Mitch was already in there, leaned over the window frame as he daydreamed about something. Alexa forced herself to think she didn't care, first because she shouldn't care and second because it was none of her business. "You tired?" She asked the young trainee.

  He nodded, turning only his head to look at her as she stood right next to him. "Sorry for that shit earlier. It was stupid." He apologized. Alexa already thought he would, but she thought it would be pathetic. Something in the style of 'oh please be with me, I can't live without you' but it sounded like he was being serious. Like he finally realized they had to be professional.

  The girl huffed and took a sip from the bottle that was still in her hand. "Hurley is not going to be around tomorrow. He has some business in town." She informed Rapp with a sigh. She could only imagine what stupid thoughts are running through his head. If Hurley doesn't come back by Wednesday- well Alexa wasn't sure what would she do in that case. It meant that he was probably dead.

The thought of Hurley dying opened up some emptiness inside of her. She wasn't exactly sad because of that, but she wasn't happy either. Even though she never thought of him as her father, she was sure as hell thankful that he helped her be the assassin that she is. Yet, she would never tell him. Because that would boost his ego too much.

"So what are we going to do?" Mitch asked, as if he had the idea that Alexa would turn the whole camp upside down just to piss Stan off. But he apparently got the wrong idea because Alexa looked at him with piercing eyes, it was somewhat terrifying.

"Look, Rapp. If you thought for one second that I'm still like I was when I was a trainee- forget it." She snapped at him, turning her head to gaze straight ahead. She wasn't going to make the same mistakes again, no matter what anybody thought.

Mitch was one hundred percent curious now. "What were you like when you were a trainee?" He asked her. The female assassin sighed, knowing that she just gave Rapp the opportunity to ask her questions she most certainly didn't want to answer.

"I was dumb." Was all she said before she drank everything left of the beer. He expected her to tell him to fuck off or go to hell, but she was unusually quiet. Like she was remembering that bothers her for a long time. "Forget it. I'm not going to talk about my past with you." She replied softly, shaking her head in the process.

Mitch huffed in disappointment. "Why can't we just be friends?" He asked, not really wanting her to answer. He thought she really hated him, but at the end of the day, that was probably for the best. She knew he thought she despised him for being annoying and reckless, but she just wanted to hold her distance because he reminded her so much of Ronnie.

It hurts to even think about the fact that Ronnie might be alive. Hell, he might even be planning a terrorist attack. After those five years of training together to become the top of their class, he threw it away by not following orders. He was reckless, just like Mitch and it pained her to think that she could become close to Rapp and then lose him just like her ex boyfriend.

"Alexa? Are you okay?" Mitch's raspy voice shook her from the trance and she grunted, rolling her eyes.

"We just can't be friends, Rapp." She finally said. "You're reckless. I can't afford being close to you and then losing you just like-" She stopped talking abruptly, biting her tongue. She knew Rapp won't leave her alone now...

"Just like?" Mitch suggested she should continue talking. He wanted to know everything now. It was probably a bad idea to tell him, but Alexa knew it was the only way she could make him leave her alone. She just hoped he won't ask questions after she tells him.

"Listen, I had a boyfriend okay. He was just like you. Reckless. Dumb. Curious all the time. And I was the same. We got into plenty of trouble. Hurley had many problems because of us, he even tried separating us for a while but nothing worked. Despite all of that, we turned out to be pretty decent assassins. Maybe because we tried being better than one another.

"I really loved him. And for all I know he loved me. Hurley was so mad he couldn't separate us. We were enough trouble on our own, but it was the worse when we decided to make a problem together. Nobody liked us so we were kinda forced to be best friends.

"At some point our relationship got really toxic because he wanted to do some stuff I knew Hurley would kill us for." She paused, taking in a deep breath before continuing to talk.

"One time, when we were going on a mission together with a bunch of others, Hurley being the lead obviously, he did the most stupid thing ever. Hurley had specifically ordered us to not go inside the house where the base of the terrorist group we were trying to take down was.

"But Ronnie wore this self confident smile as he looked at me and ran inside the house all alone. I could hear Hurley screaming a few feet behind me. Everything was quiet for a few moments and I hoped Ronnie was okay, but then the house flamed up in a second. I was numb after that I don't even remember how we got back to the camp." She finished and Rapp looked at her with disbelief. He realized just then that she didn't hate him. She just didn't want to get hurt like before.

"I'm sorry." Mitch muttered, looking at the ground. He didn't really know what to say. It felt like an appropriate moment to hug her, but she wouldn't allow that so he jus stood in his place. The room was silent for a couple of moments. "So you actually like me?"

"Oh, fuck you. I don't like you. I won't do that to myself or to Hurley." She said and he rolled his eyes, not really beleving she just said that.

"Like you care about Hurley, Alexa."

"You really want to make me hate you, you idiot." She growled at him. "I don't care about Hurley, but that doesn't matter. I'm not going to cause him even more problems. He had enough trouble because of me."

"Why did I get the impression that you hate him then?" Mitch asked her, trying to push her to tell him even more. Of course, he wouldn't ask her directly, but he wanted to know everything. It was interesting how she thought she could be so tough, but she was a totally different person when she talked about Ronnie. It was like this whole different personality that she keeps locked away.

"Will you stop asking questions? You don't need to know everything, for fucks sake. Just shut the fuck up for once, okay?" She told him with irritated tone, he smirked a bit. It was somewhat amusing to make her so irritated, it showed him that she actually cared about what he does in some way.

"Why would I?" He spoke again, trying to make her furious. "You act like you don't care, but we both know that you were the one who kissed me back in the woods." He said and she froze on an instant. The thought of kissing him made her just- fall into pure madness. She didn't even know what to say to that. Truth be told, she liked kissing him.

"I did, so what?" She scoffed. "It was a moment of weakness."

"But you liked it." He smirked, overconfident, with a slight smirk playing on his lips. She could feel her heart beat against her ricage as he made a step towards her. His body was inches away from hers and her muscles arched on reflex, her arms pushing him away.

"In your dreams, idiot." She growled and finally walked away from him, taking some of her clothes and going into the bathroom. "I'm going to take a shower, see you at dinner." She told him and closed the door, leaving Mitch to rethink everything she told him and everything that just happened.

Her past didn't hunt only her, now it bothered him too and he couldn't take his mind off what she said. You don't have to know everything. What did that mean? What else could he know? He decided that he was going to leave it for now. He wass quick to leave the room and head outside for a run, in attempt to clear his mind.