Stay {BTS FF | Jeon Jungkook}

Chapter 6

Maybe he was in the shower. We waited for almost 10 minutes but the door never opened. Panic struck me every minute. I couldn't wait longer. I finally asked Jin if he had extra keys but he said no, so we decided to force the door open. Jin pushed a few times and finally, the swung door opened.

I rushed in and called Jungkook's name but he wasn't on his bed so I assumed he was on the toilet, but there were no sounds of water. The bathroom's door was locked so Jin pushed it opened and I couldn't believe what I had just seen.

My Jungkook was lying unconscious on the floor with blood coming out of his wrist. I fell to the ground. I couldn't believe. How can he commit suicide? I never thought he would do this. I just stood there frozen to the ground. Jin was calling 911 and all the guys circled Jungkook around. Suga was shaking Jungkook's body and kept calling his name. V was sobbing and Jimin was trying to calm V down. I saw a note beside his wrist. I took it and read it, it said:

To My dear hyungs and Ashley,

I'm sorry that your golden maknae won't be here anymore. I'm depressed as the love of my life just broke up with me and I received the news that I got cancer too on the same day. Please all of you, don't blame yourselves as there are other reasons too if I were to be honest. Those are just the two things that finally made me hit the breaking point. I just can't handle it anymore, I'm really sorry. I don't want you guys to cry for me. Your tears worth everything in the world. I love every single one of you, including you A.

A, if you're reading this, I want to tell you that I don't hate you. I would never, I love you too much to hate you. I'm just a bit angry, not at you, of course not, but at myself for not being the boyfriend you wanted. To top that up, my emotions just been at bay with all the things happening recently, especially when the doctor told me I have cancer, it just my breaking point I supposed. I know you don't want to have a boyfriend who has cancer, so even If  I don't want to let you go, I had too. I don't want to be selfish to force you if you're not happy in this relationship.

It's okay A, really don't worry about me. Go  find someone who is better than me, I'm sure you will find the right boyfriend. I'm not sure if you still love me or not, but no matter what the answer is, don't let this stop you from finding a better boyfriend. Now that I've think about it, I am fine with you leaving me. There's no bad blood A.

If I were to be brutally honest, I knew our relationship was a mess and most probably wouldn't work out since the very beginning. I am right though, the strain in our relationship has just gotten worse and worse, especially now that I have to go on tours and you have your shoots, your acting career is at the top of the world and you're working on your first album. I know we're both very  busy and at the top of our careers so I guess you're right, maybe this is the time we should end this relationship, to prevent our hearts to break even more. I'm sure you'll enjoy your relationship more if your boyfriend is less busy unlike me.
Anyways enough of this talk, I hope you can come to my funeral, please come, do it for my sake just one last time, even if you, well worst comes to worst, hate me.

Please take care of my family guys, especially Jung Hyun. One last thing, please don't cancel the concert tomorrow, nor the tour. I don't want to upset the fans due to my selfishness, I swear I won't forgive all of you if you did. I love all of you, remember that! This is not a goodbye, till we meet again.

With love,
Your dearest Jungkook xx

By the time I finished the letter, my whole face was wet. My eyes were puffy and red. The paramedics had arrived and were taking Jungkook to the ambulance. Jin pulled me up and I hugged him. My foot felt like they were glued to the ground. They were shaking too, hell, my whole body was shaking.