Innocence: Lost

Chapter Eight

Luke had never felt completely weightless before.

It was like the whole world warmed around him in a glowing ember. It was like he were lying in a pile of silk fabrics. He had never left his body for so long that everything felt right. Being high made Luke understand the universe. Being high filled a void inside of Luke's adolescent mind that he didn't even know existed.

Ashton's laugh was a thrumming vibration in his ears. The two were lying particularly close. If one of the young men moved, he would be touching the other completely.

Luke felt soft and indifferent all at the same time. His ocean, blue eyes were polluted with the side effects of his high. There was a soft halo of curls pooling around his head atop of Mitchy's pillows. The younger boy was not sure if he had been at this party for an hour or a hundred years.

It was all calm. It was all giggles and relaxed thoughts from Ashton to Luke.

But then, Luke's nose bumped Ashton's.

The small amount of oxygen between their bodies quickly decreased. Luke's eyelashes were fluttering against the older boy's cheeks.

With each slow inhale, with every existential thought, Luke was millimeters from closing the gap between their lips.

Ashton's hand reached for the back of Luke's neck.

This was it. Luke felt the danger, adrenaline, pain, pleasure, the rush.

Ashton was going to kiss him. The barely even knew each other, and Ashton wanted to kiss him. Maybe it was the weed, maybe it was Luke's crush, but Luke was ready to have his first real kiss.

And as the goosebumps trailed up his skin. As the fever of his body spread. As he began to hear the sound of his own heartbeat, Calum came running in.

Ashton looked up with a groan.

Luke caught his breath. He had gotten so close to his goal. Ashton was about to kiss him. He felt his heart thrum against his chest. He could hear his pulse inside of his ringing ears.

"Dude, Jack Hemmings is here. If he sees you, he'll literally kick your ass. I think he has a knife on him!" Calum stumbled, slurring his words but still trying to get his point across.

Ashton's eyes widened, but nothing compared to Luke's.

"Jack Hemmings is my older brother. Oh my god! If he finds out I-I'm here...if he finds out that I smoked marijuana..." Luke felt the walls closing in.

Jack was very protective. It was true. Though he teased Luke nonstop, he always found a way to protect the younger boy. But he was also a snitch. He told their mother everything wrong that had ever occurred. Luke wanted to worry about how Jack knew Ashton, but he was more worried about getting caught here. High as the sky.

"Hemmings is your older brother. Fuck, and all this time I was trying to-Are you working with him?!" Ashton's mood suddenly changed.

Luke was taken aback. Ashton thought he was trying to sabotage him. Luke didn't even understand why Jack hated Ashton. He simply wanted to get home before they were caught. Luke did not like the idea of angering Ashton. It made tears pool in his beautiful eyes.

"N-No.  I just wanna go ho-home." Luke bit his trembling lip.

Luke trusted Ashton, but Ashton did not trust him.

"Hemmings. Another Hemmings. I was trying to fuck with, literally, another Hemmings. You're all good for nothing. I can't believe this!" Ashton moved away from Luke.

Luke wasn't sure why Ashton had grown so mad. He was worried about their relationship. He wanted to cry and apologize to the older boy, even though he didn't know what it was for.

As Luke was about to speak, Mitchy came in. "Um, Ash, Jack is here..."

Ashton growled. "So, I've heard! Mitchy, get this kid home.  He's Hemmings' baby brother. I don't trust him to ride home with me."

Luke felt a lump form in his throat. Silent tears trickled from his eyes. He was high and emotional. The innocent boy was stuck, high on his fantasy man's weed, and crying like a toddler. Luke just wanted to make Ashton happy. He wanted him to call him pretty things again.

Luke didn't want to leave Ashton.  He wanted to stay and finish their kiss. 

The brown haired man gave Luke a confused look, then made a gesture to say, "Cmon."

Luke didn't want to follow, but he found his legs separating from the bed and moving in strides out of the room. Mitchy took Luke out the back door and into an SUV. The two didn't speak until the doors were shut, the car was rolling, and there was cool air blowing against Luke's face. The windows were rolled down, and Luke could smell the salty sea.

Monterey had that effect on its inhabitants. The West Coast ocean calmed you, even if you couldn't clear your head.

Luke told Mitchy his address, and then he grew the confidence to ask questions.

"Mitchy..." The blonde mumbled out, his curls covered his forehead. The wind coming from the car window was brutal, but all the same, it felt relaxing.

"Yeah, Luke?"

"Mitchy, you don't know me. Why are you taking me home?" Luke asked. His tears were only stains now.

"Because, Luke. I know you're innocent, and I know this is your only chance to get away from Ashton. He just...has this thing for boys like you. You're not ready for it. He's intense, and he doesn't want you like you want him. I can promise you that. Him finding this out, him thinking you're working with Jack, it's for the best." Mitchy spoke, both of his hands were gripping the steering wheel tightly.

Luke took a second to process the words spoken to him. It seemed that he should believe someone who truly knew Ashton, but he couldn't help but think he could be a different force to Ashton.

Ashton had such a great affect on him. Call him naive. Maybe he and Ashton were brought together for a reason.

Right now though, Ashton was angry with him, but Luke could call him.  Luke could explain the misunderstanding. He and Ashton could be happy.

"I-I just want to get to know him." Luke said, his voice cracking.

"Maybe, it's for the best that you don't know anything about him." Mitchy responded quickly.

Luke's mind still felt foggy. The high wasn't a very strong one, according to  Ashton, and Luke didn't really understand that. When Ashton had lit Luke's joint, the thrill had already made Luke soar.

He was still soaring. However, now, he was soaring through negative thoughts.

When Luke was home, he laid in his huge bed. His breathing was shallow. Just like before, he snuck through the window. His room was comfortably cool, and the balcony doors were opened. Luke could see the outline of the ocean.  He could hear the waves.

Luke wished to be as free as the waves. To be as loose as the weeping willows in his backyard. To be as ever-changing as the garden full of roses.