Harry Potter and the Sympathy of Souls

VIII) "Regret"

PART THREE: SOULCRUX

"Tom." Harry smiled at the handsome man who appeared next to him on the snow covered grounds of the Forbidden Forest. He was not surprised to find himself dreaming of the man. He had gone to sleep with thoughts full of Tom, of their meeting, of the look on his face when his Horcrux was being destroyed, and of the weak smile he had given Harry once it was all over.

"Harry." Tom breathed, smiling radiantly. He leaned forward, and for a brief moment Harry thought he was going to kiss him, but Tom simply leaned in and placed his hands on Harry's shoulders.

"I feel happy." He said. "I feel happy and I feel hope, and I haven't felt either in a very long time. Thank you."

"It's my pleasure." Harry said earnestly.

Tom nodded, and let go of Harry, taking a step back. "Once I wake up, I'll once again feel sad and scared and alone, but soon, Harry, soon... there won't be any difference between how I feel in my dreams and how I feel when I wake."

Harry thought that he had never wanted something more in his life.

"For now, though, I just want to enjoy feeling whole. I have no more Horcruxes to show you- let's just walk."

~

"I don't want to kill Nagini." Tom declared, "I can't do it! She's my pet, and she's been nothing but loyal to me. And besides, look at her! She's so cute!"

Harry stared at the huge viper doubtfully. "She's certainly... er... memorable."

"And look!" Tom exclaimed, "She's doing that stretching thing with her neck! She knows it makes her too adorable to resist! Oh, why did I have to make her a horcrux?"

Harry knew from long and painful experience that people could be irrational about their pets, and therefore tactfully chose not to say that it seemed to him as if she was stretching her neck to better compare her size to Harry in order to decide if he would make a good snack. He imagined how he would feel if he needed to kill Hedwig, and grimaced in sympathy.

"There is another way, you know." He told Tom.

"Remorse? I suppose so." Tom sighed. "Destroying a horcrux is so much more simple, isn't it? Remorse seems somehow insubstantial and elusive. Still, I suppose I should try. It'll be worth it if it will make my soul whole and leave Nagini alive." He looked at Harry. "And, of course, there is still the horcrux in you. I can hardly kill you. So, in the end, it was always inevitable that I'd have to face my past."

Real and true remorse, Harry recalled Nicolas saying, requires the person to genuinely feel the pain of what they'd done. It wasn't a pleasant prospect. He suddenly fought a ridiculous urge to apologize for putting Tom in that situation. Instead, Harry gestured at Nagini and asked him "When did you get her?"

"Oh, around three years ago, a bit after Wormtail tracked me down. I liked her best, because she was stupider than most snakes. She would just blindly do whatever I said, with absolutely no independent thought. I feel like I have a duty to protect her, and she relies on me completely."

"And when did you make her into a horcrux?" Harry asked, gently prodding Tom in the right direction.

"Well, Wormtail had met Bertha Jorkins in a pub or something, and had actually managed to think for himself for long enough to convince her to follow him to me. I thought she would probably have useful information, being from the Ministry and all. I- I hurt her, trying to get her to tell me her secrets. She started talking almost immediately, and that's when I found out about the Triwizard Tournament, only I quickly realized that something was wrong. She couldn't remember the most basic things about her job, her hours, and her acquaintances, classic signs of a too-strong Obliviation Charm."