Petty SideChick : Curvaceous Woman

Chapter 13

Self Loath

I believed her all of my life even up to this very second. Now she wasn't the one bullying me about my weight now it was me.
You're too fat.
Your thighs are too big.
Your face looks round like the full moon.
Don't smile those extra fat created lines along your cheeks.
Your shoulders are broad and manly.
Your hands look like a chunk of chicken fat.
Your double neck hangs around at every angle.
Your fat stomach makes your breast look small and it also makes you look like you are six months pregnant.
You are huge! A box! A perfect square.
I cried.

 Not realizing what I was doing I throw the laptop into the only full length  glass in my house.

Everything shattered into pieces on the floor. Everything was shattered, the glass my self-esteem and confidence into  small debris.

I sighed, "Your a diamond kam" I encourage myself as I bent down on my knees to pick up the broken pieces. "You are the perfect size, not too big and not too small" I cried even more.
I wish I believed what she said, I wanted to believe so much but the chill that was running deep within my veins keep telling me otherwise.
I picked up a huge class, it shaped like a curved in triangle with three razor sharp edge. With my thumb I played with the edges, testing how sharp it actually was. To see if it was sharp enough to painlessly cut deep down into flesh.

The more I caress the edges with my thumb the harder I pressed my thumb against the sharp surface. Then finally it slip through and shamelessly slice the flesh of my finger. All I was seeing was red, red and more red.

I dig the glass more into my thumb and started dragging it down to the middle of my palms. Soon enough I'll reach the pulse on my hand but before I could slice to my palms the living room door twist opened and heavy familiar brown boots turned the corner.
Out of shame I dropped the glass.

He didn't say a word as he steered at me, instead he walked closer crushing shattered glass under his feet. I watched him stoop down to my level and held my hands. He looked at the wound intensely almost with anger.

"I slip..." I felt as if I owed him an excuse, but the words fall off my lips when he looked at me. 

"Why?" He asked looking at the mess around us. I'd always found myself lost in his eyes, his chocolate black eyes. It was always his eyes that made me tell him the truth, this guy who meant nothing to me.

"Because" I felt the tears felling again, because I couldn't even answer. There was just something that was sad and more painful about admitting your flaws out loud to your self and others. "I am fat" I told him looking away from his eyes wondering just how awful I look right now.

"I told you, you are not fat. You Are a curvaceous woman" He said. His voice deep and serious.

"Stand up" He told me. I reluctantly did with his aid. We both faced the cracked up shattered piece of glass that was still hanging on the wall.

"Look" he said. "Look how beautiful you are"
"Rosy cheeks, chisel shaped cheek bones, Huge breast a decent size stomach and a fit hand to to match those nice thighs to hold up your huge ass" I look but I couldn't see what he saw.

"I don't see it" I told him.
"You have to look for it first" He said.
I huffed and turned to look at him, "you want me to be delusional?" I asked.

"No I want you to be realistic" he said. "For any change, you have to see it first".

I think I just got the gist.

" let's clean that cut up" he told me sweeping me off my feet in bridal style. I couldn't hold back the grasp that left my lips, no one had ever even dare to try to challenge my weight and lift me up but he did, obviously struggling but he still gave me a cool smirk.

He carried me to the bathroom and sat me on the sink. I silently watched him as he cleaned my wound and bandage it.

"You might need to miss work tomorrow" he said.

"Why?" I asked confused.

"Because you are going to need stitches" I grasped.

"Is it that bad!" I practically yelled. He glared at me for an answer.

"I can just bandage it up it's not like I'm using this hand much" I stated.

"It's your right hand" he bluntly told me, I grasped.

"Oh no" I whispered.

"Baka" He muttered under his breath.

"It's a good thing I'm left handed" I sighed in relief while smiling.
I watched as my contagious smile slowly spread across his lips and soon enough he was laughing.

"Still you need a day off, I'm planning work for you" he smiled.

"Wow now you are planning to work the sick" I said, by now he was putting away the first aid kit under the bathroom sink.

I held my hands up and look at the odious white wrap on my thumb and out of curiosity I tried to bend it, but stop at the sharp pain I felt.

"Hurts now huh" he mumbled taking back my thumb in his hands then leading my hands to his mouth.

"Yea" I whispered as he kiss the wrap.

"Then I'll kiss away your pain" Some how when he said that it felt like a double meaning. As if he owed it to me.

The next morning I woke up, I was greeted to breakfast in bed and a nice suit I would never thought about hang right in front of my eyes. I looked at Jeremy and shamed my head a no.

"Oh your wearing that dress to work today, if it is the last thing I make you do"