The Vanity Code [Jinsoo]

15

Jisoo's POV

I waited for the cab that would take me to the agency for the Ball.

The night was nippy and the slight chill wafting through the lace on my back made me shiver.

I fell in love with the dress Jin gave me. Black sheer fabric, it had an alluring feel and hugged my body, but not to the point of squeezing out my gut. It reached just above my ankles.

Somehow I overcame my pride and knocked on the NYPD's chief house, asking him if I could just use the bathroom for a sec.

He and his wife welcomed me in as if I were their favourite niece. I was still dazed from ending up suddenly homeless so this was another rattle to the system. But things turned out fine, I even ended up spilling my heart out to the older woman as she fixed my hair. I decided I'd go for the usual straight hair style I always had.

She was a wise woman who only let me talk and talk until my mouth ran dry.

In the end, all she said was: "You should talk to your mom tonight, before something happens and you'll regret not hearing her voice one last time."

And yet, even after promising her, there I was, still twiddling my phone in my hands as I waited for the cabbie, with my clutch tucked underneath my arm.

I'll call later. Or maybe right now? What if I had an accident? What if she had an accident? She hadn't really fallen, nor did we have a carer, that had all been part of my cover story.

While riding in the cab, my mobile vibrated. And what do you know, it was Eomma calling.

I took the call. "Anyeonghaseyo?"

"Jisoo!" she chirped. My heart scrunched up.

"Eomma" I said brokenly, "mianhae... I've been a terrible daughter..."

"Eh eh, come on now, I don't want to hear you crying, eh? Jennie told me you're having it a bit hard juggling modelling and your police work. And oh, guess what! I even found a magazine with you in it, you look so beautiful, love!"

She sounded so happy to talk to me.

"Eomma, I'm a monster, I'm so sorry for neglecting you. Forgive me" I begged.

The cab driver kept giving me strange looks in the overhead mirror, probably because my voice sounded like that of a dying whale.

"Aiishh, Jisoo, it's ok. I'm your eomma. Yes, it was rough and I missed you lots but...you picked up now so everything's okay! I was getting worried about you."

"Mianhe." I sounded like a stuck record.

"Jennie suggested I call you around this time. It's almost noon here, and I was just making some samgyetang. I'll make lots when you come back, eh? You can eat for days on end to your heart's content."

A lump got stuck in my throat but I was determined not to cry and spoil the makeup we had painstakingly put on my face.

"Eomma...I don't know..."

"Hmm?"

"I mean, I'm coming back for sure but...." I trailed, desperately casting around for answers. All that I saw were neon signs and streetlights flashing by dizzyingly fast.

Was I ready to go back and leave this wonderland behind? With my looks, and Jin beside me, I had it easy....

"Seokjin used to say that" she said suddenly, her voice soft, "his mother told me. The first few months he emigrated, he kept promising he'll visit her, kept promising he'll set her up and make sure she's well looked after. But now...he barely even speaks with her..."

"Eomma, I'm not like Jin!"

"Jisoo, if you decide you like your new life with Seokjin better than here, it's okay. I'll be happy for you "she told me seriously, "but if you do, please tell me beforehand, so I can...mourn you...and don't make me promises you don't intend to keep, remember what I taught you. It's your life, your choice."

"What's gotten into everyone today?" I cried, "Can somebody please just listen to me--"

The connection crackled. I heard her calling my name and then the line went dead.

I just slumped into my seat, utterly drained, and didn't bother phoning again.