Redemption of a Soul

Chapter 9

After struggling with the decision to leave bar or beat Ryan's ass a second time Eli's hand was forced. He left the bar without a word to William or anyone else and headed straight back to his place. When he arrived he quietly opened the front door only to be startled by Claire's screams.

Claire's body was tossing around on the couch aggressively. The only coherent words that Eli could hear were please and stop as Claire reached her arms above her as if she was pushing someone or something away. Her legs started flinging around wildly under the blanket and then she suddenly stopped moving.

Eli is unsure of how to respond because he has never had to comfort anyone having a nightmare. He just stands there waiting to see if her dream has subsided and also observing if her body is still rising and falling from breathing. It's probably an irrational fear that formed during his many years of drug use hoping that his partners would not die from overdose.

Once he notices her breath he takes a few cautious steps closer to Claire's resting body. The closer he gets the more prominent the tears on her cheeks become. Claire then starts mumbling the word no repetitively. Eli immediately pieces the words together and assumes her nightmare is caused by the torture from Ryan earlier today. Each of these things is accumulating in the hate column for Ryan which only furthers Eli's rage.

"I should have killed that motherfucker." As Eli said this he started to ambulate around the living room. He became very distressed about the fact that Ryan could easily hurt Claire again if he wanted to and was brave enough. Eli's thoughts worked him into a restless mess. Soon enough he convinced himself that it would be easier just to go ahead and murder Ryan. "It's not like anyone would even fucking miss him." Eli grunted as he stomped into his kitchen.

He grabbed a pen and notebook and stated concocting a plan on how exactly he would execute Ryan. Preferably without getting caught. Eli quickly realized that all of the plans he wrote would easily land him in prison which only drove him more mad. First he slung the pen at the wall across from him and the notebook quickly followed suit.

Eli inhaled deeply and stretched his arms to the edges of the kitchen island to brace himself. He desperately needed to calm down before he did something senseless. He gripped his hands so tight around the lip of the counter that he could feel it puncturing his skin. Eli blacked out momentarily from the sudden rush of blood from his heart to his arms. Before he realized what he was doing he opened his eyes to find his arm plunged straight through the cheap bar top. Eli then tenderly extracted his arm from the counter to find he only had minor scratches. It wasn't anything to get stitches for at least.
"You know what. I don't care if I go to prison. Killing that fucker will be worth it." Eli announced. He stalks around his house gathering supplies like duct tape, pliers and various kitchen knives. "I'll walk into the bar. Sneak up on him and slam his head against the table to knock his ass out. No one will call the cops because they are pieces of shit. I'll tape his arms and legs and drag him over to the abandoned warehouse behind the bar." Eli nods his head. Everything about his plan seems flawless so far.

He halts his search for a moment when he sees Claire rustle around on the couch but continues once she stops moving. Eli finishes planning his scheme barely talking quieter than before. "Then I'll slowly start torturing him by pulling his nails or eyelashes out one by one. Eventually I'll probably cut his fucking nuts of just for Claire. After that I might put him out of his misery by slicing him open in a couple of places and let him bleed out."

Claire groans as she sits straight up. Eli's eyes immediately find her confused ones. He knows that she has heard his premeditation to murder Ryan and apologizes. "Shit sorry. You weren't supposed to hear any of that. You didn't hear any of that, because it has to be done." As Claire becomes aware of exactly what is going on around her she concludes that Eli is in fact having a mental breakdown. She knows that it was inevitable so she remains calm. After everything that she knows he has been accumulating emotion wise without any type of release is cause for a meltdown. He has been sober for a month which only adds to the chaos that is Eli Westen.

Eli continues rambling and pacing the length of his home with Claire trailing him stealthily. She just wants to make sure he isn't going to actually hurt anyone or himself. After a few minutes pass Claire speaks up. "Eli are you okay?" The abruption in Eli's thoughts strikes one of his ever thinning nerves and he plunges his fist through the drywall next to his bathroom door. Like nothing happened Eli looks at the floor and responds slowly, "Nothing is okay Claire. Nothing that happened today is normal and it shouldn't have happened at all. Especially not to you. I don't know. Maybe I feel like putting that lunatic, Ryan, six feet under will equal everything back out." Claire is listening attentively to everything that Eli has to say even though she already knows things are out of place now.

"I can't just sit here and do nothing. That's not who I am. I don't know who the fuck I was trying to fool pretending to be some civilized hero. If it were a year ago I would have beat that motherfuckers head into the pavement and you know it. Maybe it's your fault." Hostility is clear in Eli's eyes. He is standing in close proximity to Claire now with an aggressive finger pointed at her. "You have put all this bullshit in my head about being better and stronger and smarter. Fuck! I can't believe I let you do this to me. You've turned me into some sort of pussy or something. I can't believe that just because you're this sexy, nice doctor you could trick me so easily." Eli's words burn inside Claire's chest. It is possible that she cares a little to much for Eli. She can't help but instantly want to apologize to Eli, but she is interrupted before she can utter a word.

Out of nowhere the coffee table flies five or six feet from its stationary position. Eli is spiraling. Claire determines that she has to do something...Anything to soothe Eli before he breaks other stuff. She does not deliver relief to Eli soon enough because a lamp crashes from the side table to the floor shattering in the process. Claire screams in surprise and Eli pauses the destruction of his own property to quickly check if she is hurt or not; She isn't so he continues his hunt for something else to damage. As soon as Eli's hand touches one of the kitchen chairs Claire yells at him to stop. She rushes towards him and grabs his hands to prevent him from acting further. "Everything is okay Eli. You don't have to break anything. I am fine. You are fine. Nothing else bad is going to happen I promise," Claire whispers.

Eli snatches his hands from hers and gently pushes Claire away from him. He thinks she is just trying to play with his mind again. "Get away from m-." Eli is cut off when Claire yanks Eli back to her and plants her lips against his. She honestly did not have a clue of what else to do in order to distract Eli. Kissing him seemed like the only logical and attainable action.

Eli is stunned at first but settles into the kiss swiftly. Unsurprisingly enough Claire actually enjoys having her lips attached to Eli's. It is relieving to her, and she wonders if it is having the same effect on him. The tension has built up between them for months now, and it's finally being shaved away. As they both relax further into each other Eli slides his tongue past Claire's supple lips to caress her tongue. Somehow they guide each other back to the living room where they flop onto the couch. Claire straddles Eli's lap as they continue to make out.

Both Claire and Eli's minds stayed tranquil for a while until Claire's morality began peeking through the figurative cracks in the privacy curtain of her brain. "Oh God. What am I doing? I can't do this." Claire says breathlessly. She pushes her palms into Eli's shoulders to keep their faces as far apart as possible without removing herself from her current position. Eli shakes his head disapproving of Claire's actions while trying to pull her back in for more. He smirks when she glares at him, but she gives in anyway. After another quick makeout she detaches herself completely from Eli. She stands in front of Eli for a moment with her eyes fixed on him. Eli becomes slightly uncomfortable and he clears his throat whilst adjusting himself on the sofa.

Suddenly Claire announces robotically, "I'm sorry. I have to go." She grabs her purse from the floor beside the tv stand, opens the door and walks out without another word.