Cold Wave (Bleach Lovestory)

Chapter 11 - His Past

"My name is Arashi and I'm the zanpaktou of Tamami Hoseki."
Tamami nodded, but she knew there was more to come. It took him some time until he continued, hesitantly.
"But... before that... I was called Mirai..."
"Mirai...?", there were so many questions running through her head. He looked away from her in guilt.
"I wanted to tell you for so long... but how? And would you have believed me? It's even a ridiculous story now that you know me..."
She shook her head and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"I trust you... Please tell me more."
He nodded slowly and opened his mouth again, beginning to tell her his story.

"It happened long before you were born. A young shinigami just like you trained at the academy. His name was Kenshin Hane. He was an honest boy, never complained and finished each of his exams with excellent grades. He learnt my name quite early and had a lot of time to train and get used to my power. The power... of changing the future..."
"Changing... the future itself?"
"Yes... I was able to show him through visions what was going to happen in the near future."
"A... very strong power if you ask me."
"Indeed. At first there was no need to worry. He never changed much, only used it for his advantage to win battles or protect people who were dear to him. But that all changed on that one fateful day..."

Arashi went quiet and a look of sadness overcame him.
"It was his first ever mission after graduation and he got... lucky. It was together with his parents - a seemingly small mission - defeat a hollow and get back home. There were no reports about its abilities so no one thought it would be really difficult. Facing it in battle proved otherwise though... Kenshin and his parents soon noticed that whatever attack they threw at the hollow fired back instantly. As if... it already knew what would happen..."
"D-don't tell me... it also had-"
"Future vision abilities? Sadly, yes... I told him to stay calm, because I told him it would be useless using my powers against such an enemy. I wanted him to be the smarter one, he was relying too much on his future actions than his present abilities..."
"And... what happened then?"
"... The hollow got his parents..."

Tamami gasped. It took such a dreadful turn?
"Blinded by his rage Kenshin fought back and took revenge for them, killing the hollow brutally."
"W-wait a second... why was he suddenly able to strike back? Didn't the hollow see it coming?"
"There is one thing that we can't see in our visions: changed actions controlled by emotions. I can only assume that that was the case with the hollow too..."
"Huh... and Kenshin...? What... happened with him afterwards?"
"He lost his mind completely... His parents were everything to him and he blamed himself for their death. No one else did, but the voices of his friends, comrades, even his Captain didn't matter to him. He had always used my power - our power to protect the people he loved... but this time it got them killed."

She couldn't believe what she was hearing.
"But... what does all of that have to do with you? With... us?"
He looked at her sternly, silently asking her to be patient.
"Unable to forgive himself he went mad. He set it in his mind that if he could change the future, the past too had to be manipulable. He kept asking me to help him bring back his parents, bring back his happiness and erase his faults, but it was something I could never do... He yelled at me at how awful of a zanpaktou I was, that he couldn't trust me anymore, that I wasn't even trying... so I went silent. He didn't want to hear any excuses from me so I fulfilled his wishes and let him do whatever he wanted and experience with me however he pleased. He was... my master after all."

Arashi smiled heartbroken at Tamami and she felt his pain.
"But he went too far... and I later realized I should have stopped him way sooner. He began to abuse my powers and even challenged his friends to use them for his experiments. He stopped caring for the people who still cared about him, who still loved him and always wanted to win to analyse the changes in each battle. With them he began to create a small device which he attached to me."
"And what did it do exactly?"
"He was able to manipulate my powers... and turn them the other way around..."
"You mean... he..."
"Was able to turn back time and change the past... He finally achieved his goal after so long..."
"I-Impossible! No one should be able to do that, wouldn't you mess up all the time parallels? You can't just bring back someone who's time in this world... already stopped...", she couldn't help but tear up in sympathy. She couldn't imagine what she would have done, but that all seemed just wrong.

The white haired man gave her a small nod.
"I tried to tell him the same. I tried to reason with him, tried to warn him about the consequences, that he was about to do something forbidden, that no one should be able to change time in that manner, but he had stopped listening to me long ago... so I had no choice."
Arashi hugged himself and dug his fingernails into his clothes until he could feel them pierce through his skin.
"I... destroyed myself..."
"... W-what...?", her eyes went wide.

"When a shinigami dies, his zanpaktou vanishes together with him to pay their last respects... but under certain circumstances... it also works the other way around..."
"So... when you destroyed yourself..."
"I... hopefully... took Kenshin with me..."
"Hopefully...?"
"He had detached himself from me so much... I was never sure if it really worked... All I ever wanted... was to save this world... and I was afraid of the outcome... So maybe, I actually just wanted to run away from all of that..."
"Arashi..."
"I tried to forgive myself the best I could... but it never really left my mind... and when I met you... I never thought that someone would give me a second chance... to make it right... and now?"
"And... now?"
"You're able to use the same powers... and I don't know why! I can't let the same happen to you! I can't let history repeat itself!"
"Arashi..."
"I don't think I could do it a second time..."

She sighed and took his face into her hands carefully, making him look at her.
"Arashi... please calm down...", his eyes still showed a hint of panic, "Tell me... Can you see me?"
"Of course I can..."
"And can you also hear me call you by your name? Your real name?"
"I-I can..."
"I never imagined that you were involved in something so... deep... but I can promise you that even if I'm somehow able to use these powers... I won't abuse them. And I won't loose trust into you. As long as you'll guide me I know I'm safe", she smiled warmly at him and he finally relaxed.
"Tamami..."
"I'm your master now and you're my zanpaktou - I'll gladly repeat it. You're a part of me. But you're still your own being. And... maybe you've even got a small part of someone else still inside of you... but that's what makes you you. You deserve your second chance as a water based zanpaktou. As Arashi."
Arashi hugged Tamami tightly and almost squeezed her too hard. She knew he needed that now.
"Thank you so much, Tamami..."
"Anytime."

"Let's look into a brighter future together."

_____

Dear readers,
Thank you all for being so patient and hopefully enjoying my story.
In the picture you can see Tamami's Shikai :)
And I know, there hasn't happened a lot of romance so far, but it's really hard to combine my ideas of the story with a love story. I hope you can be even more patient with me. ^^
Lots of love♡