Twelve

Eleven.

He probably knew, when they met again. Not at the lake but at a party. He got invited but didn't know why. He went to it but didn't know why either. Now he stood at the rooftop of the flat-roofed building because he didn't like all the drunk and semi-happy people. He just wanted his cigarette. He stood up there for too long and smoked too much but he couldn't care less. He came up. And saw him. And took his cigarette. And led him away from the railing and sat down with him. 'Why are you crying?' He didn't know. He didn't even realize he was crying. 'Are you sober?' He hadn't drunk a bit. 'I am.' He knew that he couldn't stand alcohol. Well at least he should have, once did.
They sat next to each other and he desperately longed for the time when he wasn't smoking and they were still talking. He probably cried some more. 'Let me help you. Please.'
'You can't.'
He shifted. Kneeled infront of him. Turned him to look at the other boy. Other teenager. Almost adult. A hand in his neck. Ice blue and dark blue. He wondered if his own ice blue eyes matched the teary red around them. Probably not. They were inches apart. The other one swallowed hard. 'Please let me help you.' he whispered again before his lips touched his owns ever so gently. On one side of his mouth. On the other. He pulled away. To fast.
'Tell me what's wrong. Please.', but he wasn't in the mood for talking, he was in the mood for kissing. He leaned back in. More demanding this time. Their lips met again, not so gentle this time. The other boy's were rough, cold against his hot from crying ones. The touch in his neck tightened and himself brought his hand up to the others hair and hip. He pulled him down onto his own lap. The other opened his mouth and he let his tongue slip onto his hot lips. He couldn't do anything besides opening his own mouth. It was like caramel. The kiss softly melted but at the same time was completely different. It was rough and filled with cigarette smoke and taste of alcohol. Both almost faded but still there. He ran his hand up through his hair and pulled it. The other moaned into the kiss. Fuck. He smiled until he felt cold fingers moving up his sides under his shirt, stopping at his ribs and moving along them. Fuck.
All the feelings he trapped out over the past months flood into him and he shed some more tears, not knowing how else to cope with them. Hungrily he tightened the grip around hair and hips and kissed his way to ear and neck. The other moaned again and tightened the grip around his ribs. Almost carving in them. He sucked at the others neck, kissed it, licked it. It felt so good to finally do all this.

'Elijah.' the other said his voice rough.

'Phoenix.' he said back, breathing heavily.

Said boy rested his forehead against his. 'We should stop, we're in public.'

'I don't care.' Elijah said. Meaning it. He stretched his head and licked along Phoenix' jaw and brought his hands on both sides of his hips and moved slightly inwards. Phoenix could barely hold in his moan.

'But I can't guarantee that I can stop myself if we go any further.', Phoenix told him, his cold hands pressed flat against Elijah's raising chest under his shirt.

'Let's stop then.', Elijah suggested, not meaning it.

'Yeah.', Phoenix said, still looking at Elijah's lips.

They kissed again. And again and their hands trailed up each others bodies until Elijah pulled away.

'I like your kind of help.', he said.

'Oh fuck you.' Phoenix half laughed and wanted to get up but this time Elijah didn't let him.

'Everything's good again?', Phoenix asked.

'No.', he answered. 'But better.'

Piercing Ice blue eyes met the, in the night almost black, dark blue ones.

'That's enough for now, now please stop crying.', Elijah did and held Phoenix close - probably closer than ever - to his chest on a rooftop in a stormy august night.